User talk:Marshaho808/Pele Draft

Marshaho808 I just wanted to let you know that a peer editor should be getting you feedback tonight. If not, I will send you my comments tomorrow morning. Sorry for the wait, and thank you for your patience! Gardneca (talk) 07:45, 17 April 2019 (UTC)

Peer review
I like where this is at and I think that this is a great addition to the original page. I really like how you include chants about Pele because I believe it is important to share with people. Sharing the chants also help to teach people how important she was to our culture. I also liked how you told the story because it was engaging and not confusing; sometimes people can get lost with all the Hawaiian names and places. I don't have many changes to suggest other than possibly re-formatting the chants so the translation into English is on the side of it. I think this will help people to better understand the translation so they can see the chant being translated line by line. I would say that you have done very well and there are no really big changes you need to do. The biggest thing I could relate from your article to mine (about Kamapuaʻa) is the way you told the story. Hawaiian myths have a certain format in the way they flow and I think the way you wrote the story was very much like most Hawaiian myths. I plan to apply the same method of storytelling into my article about Kamapuaʻaʻs myths. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Kainoasa (talk • contribs) 19:38, 17 April 2019 (UTC)

Okay, thank you! Marshaho808 (talk) 22:17, 17 April 2019 (UTC)


 * Kainoasa thanks for your helpful feedback and your personal insight. Marshaho808 I really like the idea of formatting the chant so that the translation appears next to the original text. If you're having trouble doing that don't be afraid to contact the Wikipedia experts to see if they can help you. I think your addition of the Pele and Hi'iaka story is great, I'd like to see if you can find alternative versions of this myth. Remember to utilize the librarians at Hamilton (or even the folks over at the Bishop museum) to see if they can help you with more bibliography. The other thing I think that could make help improve this page substantially is the addition of images, so browse open-access image sites and see if there is anything there to add to your article. I'm really looking forward to seeing how this looks when you're all done! Gardneca (talk) 01:17, 22 April 2019 (UTC)