User talk:Mech2960price/sandbox

MECH 2960 Instructor Review
Here are my comments on the various sections. But overall, I'm really liking the changes, and I see you've been able to add some things onto general wikipedia already!

Explanation section:
 * "Alumina's" should be without the apostrophe
 * the word "very" is seldom used in technical writing. It is sufficient to say that they are "widely" used rather than "very widely".
 * for "... and in areas of corrosive environments." you could probably remove the "in areas" words from that phrase without harming the meaning
 * You don't have to capitalize alumina everywhere
 * I don't know where this "explanation" section is going to fit in the article ... where will it be?
 * The title "Explanation" is vague, if it's going to be its own section

MAKEUP Section:
 * Is this section going to be combined with the current "structure" section?
 * instead of saying "will have 10-20%", which is using future tense, please stay in the present tense
 * You say there's a 20-30% increase in strength, but you don't say what that strength increase is relative to? Which material is 20-30% lower in strength?
 * When you say "Depending on the percentage that is Zirconium," do you mean zirconia or zirconium? They are not the same thing.
 * The word "This" should always be followed by a noun in technical writing to make it obvious what you're referring to.
 * For "This process causes internal strains, which causes crack in the structure of the Zirconium. Because of the crack, the Zirconium particles allowed to switch phases and move more freely amongst the Alumina particles.".  Should it be "cracks" or "crack"? I'm a bit confused by this section.  Is this type of transformation explained somewhere else on wikipedia and you could link to it.

I have to go to class but will write more at 9:30pm UML MECH2960 (talk) 23:26, 11 December 2018 (UTC)

MECH 2960 Instructor Review #2
Sorry I didn't get to more comments until now! Here are my final suggestions based on the live wikipedia page:
 * For your first two sentences, you could combine by saying "Zirconia toughened alumina (also known in industry as ZTA)..." Then you can delete the sentence "It is also known in industry as ZTA." Much more concise that way!
 * It say as the third sentence starts "Zirconia aluminia", but did you mean alumina (instead of aluminia)? Also the linked article I don't think is linking to the correct thing?
 * It's an article on ZTA, so it's a bit awkward to say "Zirconia aluminia (or zirconia toughened alumina), a combination ...". instead, maybe want to say "Zirconia toughened alumina (or zirconia alumina), a combination ..."
 * What does AZ stand for? The abbreviation isn't defined anywhere.
 * For the sentence: "A common specimen of Zirconia Toughened Alumina will have 10-20% zirconium oxides." Just say oxide instead of oxides (it's not plural in this context)
 * For the "The 20-30% increase in strength", I'm still not sure what it is relative to. Is it 20-30% stronger than a zirconia with no alumina?
 * The sentence on stress-induced transformation toughening is related to the first few sentences in your paragraph. Maybe would be good to move that up to the same location rather than bouncing back and forth.
 * Still have the same confusion and recommendations about the cracks-related sentences in that paragraph.
 * Typo in sentence "ZTA has a diverse range of properties, giving its’ importance in an array of applications." The apostrophe is not necessary. In general this sentence isn't conveying much information, so it could be deleted.
 * For the various applications, would be good to have primary sources for each of the applications.

Overall, nice enhancement of the article. Please make these changes sometime in the next few days! UML MECH2960 (talk) 19:56, 13 December 2018 (UTC)