User talk:MewMobile/Patricia Gregory/EllaEberhardt Peer Review

Peer review

The lead provides great insight about Patricia indulging her nickname in order to ensure the reader knows who the writer ifs referring to throughout the article.

The lead is concise and to the point, but I think the information regarding her father's support should. be elaborated on in this section, later-on, or cut-out. It is important that her father's disapproval shows the environmentPatricia was dealing with, but it doesn't reflect as to why this matters. Furthermore, in the lead I would just add a sentence or two reflecting the sequential order of the article.

All of the content is relevant to the topic and I think it was important how much the group expanded on Partcia's efforts in joining the organization which led her creating of her own team. I think the middle section could be split into two parts, as it is. long but full of very integral information regarding Patricia's efforts in feminism. The best way to split in. my opinion would be from her letter and she was rejected, into her creation of the team, to becoming secretary of the association.

All of the content is neutral as it is fact-based and supported by secondary sources. I. think that each section does a very great job at reflecting the importance of her actions leading up to becoming secretary in 1972.I think more information regarding her family's opinions could be uninteresting add, as it could better illustrate the equity challenge being addressed through Patricia's workin football.

The secondary sources are phenomenal as this group utilized10 secondary sources, with disparate authors--allowing them to steer away from biased writings.

The content is very well-written and concise, as it is an easy read and uses less academic words,in order to ensure everyone can attain the information necessary throughout the article. Guiding questions:

There are no pictures with the article,but I think a picture of the league UEFA would be a nice touch, as most of her efforts related to this league.

The article meets all the necessary requirements and is super well-written. My only critiques reside in maybe adding a picture, expanding on familial life, and stating the order of the article in the lead!