User talk:Mille7sm/sandbox

Your title is good, short, and simple. The first sentence is fairly useful, I would change it to have the team he played on and about how many years he played for them in the first sentence along with his position on the team. The lead section is a clear summary except that the 3rd and 4th sentences are basically the same, so maybe try to combine them to keep yourself from being repetitive. The article is written well in your own words and is clear and easy to read for a non-expert. The article is very fact-based and unbiased, so it's good for Wikipedia. Article seems to have some short choppy sentences throughout, and at the end of the lead there is a first-person "we" that should be removed. The article has good consistent formating with the rest of Wikipedia. The biggest problem with this article is that there seems to be a lot of information that isn't cited, I would try to cite each piece of information at the end of the sentence. You can cite the same source multiple times, not just once. There are good links between Wikipedia Articles. Make sure you get all five sources in there and your all good. GermF (talk) 18:59, 23 October 2019 (UTC) GermF (Grant)