User talk:Mizmind/sandbox

My's peer review
Hi Sasha, I really like how well-planned your draft is. It shows how much effort you have put into editing the wikipedia page! One thing that I noticed in the beginning is that you do not include the sources for your drafting, so it is confusing to see which sentence is factual and which is subjectives. This sentence "The government manages the distribution of profits, one of the regulations being that as seniority rises, profits will rise for those workers, even up to 70%." -- you might want to consider split the sentence up. Other than that, great job! Looking forward to talking more to you about it.

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UPDATE: Lead: Did not state the importance of the topic so I cannot really rate of its significance. However, I do believe that the information you are adding to the article will be very important to the article. Structure: I am still quite confused about the structure of your drafting. Would love to see it gets cleaned up! Balance: Not sure where the drafting is exactly so I cannot comment on that. Neutrality: Some of the sentences (might come from citation, but I am not sure where the citation is) seems bias and need to be fixed. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Mnguyenn96 (talk • contribs) 02:26, 8 November 2018 (UTC)