User talk:Mleary24/sandbox

Hi my name is Maddy and I am a sophomore from New YorkMleary24 (talk) 17:15, 17 April 2019 (UTC)

Social Organization
Up to here most of the translation is pretty clear. It seems like this section may have been a bit difficult to translate though, and it seems to be too literally translated. For example, the first sentence is a bit wordy. I would take out the words "In the" and start with "Tehuelche groups ..."

Another note - "often unknown accidents" I can see how it would work in Spanish, but perhaps in English could just be translated to something like, "often uknown (incidents, occurrences). I think "accidents" should be replaced.

Strawberysteph (talk) 16:30, 15 May 2019 (UTC)steph

Overall translation
Maddy,

I think this is a great first draft! You can clearly see the time and effort you put into completing it. I think as it stands now, it is very comprehensive and informational.

In the draft there are a few instances where sentences or words in Spanish were left in. I went ahead and changed some of those to english. That's just a small housekeeping thing to keep an eye out for, for the final draft.

Again, as a first draft this is great. I think you've used your resources extremely well. My only note for the next draft would be - everything is very literally translated as of now. So, when going back and rereading what you've written, it's a good idea to stray away from the spanish article, and take some liberty in the translation. Without changing the information or adding things that are not factual, you can go in a manipulate the sentences so they make more sense in english. At times the wording doesn't exactly make sense due to the literal translation. Some phrases that go well in the spanish article would make more sense said in a different way in the english one. In my next post I will make note of a few of these sentences.

Strawberysteph (talk) 16:45, 15 May 2019 (UTC)steph

A few sentences to take a look at...
"The classification of indigenous groups that live in the Pampas and Patagonia is confusing due to they use to refer to the native population groups from these regions in the south of South America."

This seems to just be a syntactical error

'"The name Guénena-kéne was provided to Escalda in 1945 by Chief Ciriaco Chaquilla from the Chubet Panyanieyo area, who identified as “Pampa verdadero”. He spoke their language gününa-këna. Escalada says he on the group with: British traveler Guillermo Cox'', who went through the south of Neuquén in 1863 and named them “Northern Tehuelche people;” [7] with the Swiss missionary Juan Federico Hunziker, who was in the Patagonia in 1864 and called them the“genacin;”[8] with Francisco Pascasio Moreno who in 1876 called them the “gennaken;” and with rural teacher Tomás Harrington, who went through Chubet between 1911 and 1935 and compiled a vocabulary which he published in 1946 stating that the indigenous peoples who informed him about their almost dead language referred to themselves as “gününa küne" ''' This paragraph is a bit confusing. In the middle I sort of lose a sense of who is being talked about, and why. What is the goal of this paragraph? With clearer language I think it would be easier to capture the essence.

The italicized is a small grammatical error

"The Argentinean historian and paleontologist Rodolfo Casamiquela reviewed Escalda’s classifications in his books. Rectificaciones y ratificaciones hacia una interpretación definitiva del panorama etnológico de la Patagonia y área septentrional adyacente (1965), Un nuevo panorama etnológico del area pan-pampeana y patagónica adyacente (1969) y Bosquejo de una etnología de la provincia de Río Negro (1985), reaffirming the existence of a Tehuelche Complex."

I'm not 100% sure, but I think if there is an English translation of these books, you can translate the title...I think its worth asking Professor Hoot.

"In the central Patagonia there was also an ancient transition language between the penkkenk and the aonekkenk languages, called tehuesh (tewsün, téushenkenk or teushen) and it was gradually replaced by the aonekkenk language. However, a large portion of the current names of places in the central plateau retains its tewsün roots today, for example the term "chupat" from which derived the name of the province, Chubut."

I think "In the" or at least, "the" can be taken out in the first sentence. This is one of the instances of literal translation. I imagine that in Spanish it said, "En la Patagonia central," or something along those lines. Saying "In Central Patagonia" would suffice

Comentarios segundo borrador
¡Buen trabajo, Maddy! Por supuesto, quedan unas cositas por arreglar aún, así que aquí van mis comentarios, en el orden en que surgieron en el texto.

Introducción

 * from the Patagonia in South America = from Patagonia (no es the Patagonia en inglés; es algo que vale la pena cambiar en todo el artículo)
 * their population in Chile have been extinguished = has been? Además, es extinguished la mejor palabra?
 * According to the historian, Antonio Pigafetta, <-- En este caso y el siguiente no necesitas las comas

Classifications

 * the vast area that inhibited Spanish explorers??
 * from the south to the Strait of Magellan = toward the south? or just south?
 * from the north to the Colorado river = toward the north? or just north?
 * Colorado river <-- este enlace no es el correcto
 * The presence or lack thereof Tehuelche = The presence, or lack thereof, of Tehuelche
 * relationship and limits were with the Mapuches = relationship and borders?
 * in to five simple categories = into?
 * Es evidente que... <-- Aunque es una cita, vale la pena traducirla para que el lector la pueda comprender
 * People of the Molle resin?
 * were located from the Mendoza province = were based in Mendoza province?
 * Buenos Aires Providence = Buenos Aires Province?

Languages

 * Hay un problema con la foto. File:Museo LP 050 Tehuelche Cloak.JPG
 * the het languages... <-- Aquí y en todo el resto del artículo, los nombres de las lenguas y los grupos étnicos se escriben en mayúscula en inglés. También es mejor agregar un enlace si es posible.

Social organization & Religion

 * a violation of this rule implicated war = implied war?
 * More often than not, instead of bartering <-- Citation needed
 * t the Patagonia = to Patagonia
 * In the 21st century, most of the... <-- Citation needed

History

 * guanaco hunting <-- incorporar un enlace
 * (vegas, mallines... = meadows, wetlands
 * among which include?
 * The Mapuche influence has its origins in the aforementioned paragraph?
 * extending for the Andes Moutains = From? Along? (Also note the typo)
 * and no by descendants of Native inhabitants. = and not by... (also, not sure about capitalization here)
 * the introduction formed an equestrian complex amongst groups?
 * Rhea meat?
 * huemul, deer, mara and even pumpa and jaguar meat <-- Si no hay traducciones de estos animales, debes incluir enlaces a sus artículos
 * There groups use to consist of between 50 and 100 members. = Their? Used to?
 * cholilas (strawberries, (frutillas, blackberries, caulks, pehuén seeds, llao llao, buds and coligüe buds, etc.) ?
 * Whereas the selknam from Tierra del Fuego did not develop a comparable equestrian complex. <-- Esta no es una oración completa.

Present day

 * In the Chubet Province <-- ¿No es Chubut?
 * which was removed from the Neuquén mountain are by the = who was... area...?

Muy buen trabajo!Bradhoot (talk) 16:13, 5 June 2019 (UTC)