User talk:Mo14rnn/visualimpairmentsandbox

MOVING STUFF TO ACTUAL PAGE
Sp14ud, Tm13wg Hey guys, not really sure what else to put. I used drained my resources for information on the topics I covered.. If you have any suggestions let me know! That would be awesome. Also, I tried looking for some good images but came up short. Bm14pq (talk) 21:42, 4 November 2014 (UTC)
 * There is one thing we all need to figure out. If we cite the same citation more than once, then the little number should be the same, rather than having repeated citations at the bottom. Do you know what I am trying to say? Sp14ud (talk) 00:37, 5 November 2014 (UTC)
 * I know what you mean Sp14ud, I'm just not sure how to do that.. Bm14pq (talk) 01:40, 5 November 2014 (UTC)
 * I didn't even notice that it did that, I'm not really sure how to fix that either. Should I go ahead and add the changes we made to the actual page ? Tm13wg (talk) 02:22, 5 November 2014 (UTC)
 * We each have to copy and paste our own changes onto the page, so that Lynn knows who did what. Why don't we wait until after or on the break in 1P10 tomorrow? Then we can ask Lynn how to do the citation thing. Sp14ud (talk) 02:36, 5 November 2014 (UTC)

Okay guys I fixed it so that it is ready to go onto the actual page. Let's do it today during our break in 1P10 Sp14ud (talk) 15:25, 5 November 2014 (UTC)

Sp14ud, Tm13wg, Bm14pq put a description here to tell your classmates what in the sandbox is your edits. You have comments and suggestions on the article talk page already. That means you can start thinking about how you can make some more improvements to the page - and even start to make some of the changes. You could follow-up on Adam's offer of advice if you'd like to. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 21:41, 8 November 2014 (UTC)

Summary of our edits
Hey fellow classmates whom will be editing our section of the visual impairment page. All the sections that we edited are in bold and will be under the Communication heading. Feel free to leave your suggestions towards us on how to improve this page as it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks guys! Bm14pq (talk) 20:50, 10 November 2014 (UTC)

Initial thoughts and critique of article
I thought our article was very well written and organized, as it was very informative, easy to read and follow. The information in our article seem credible and is well sourced, with plenty of reliable references and also references that are up to date. Our article does follows most of the rules for a 'good article criteria', but I completely agree that the article requires help in the images area. There are minimal images provided in our article and the images that are provided do not really help support the information given, as I found them small and unclear. I believe that if we added some good diagrams/pictures it would really help support the information and make the article stronger and clearer. I also think that expanding on the section based on economic impact is a great idea! By adding the economic impact visual impairment has on Canada it would really help improve our article. And I’m just throwing and idea out there but I was thinking maybe we could do some research and make a section on visual impairment in children. I thought that the article just brushed over age and visual impairment and did not go into any detail about children with visual impairment. Or maybe we could expand on visual impairment and gender, because the article does say that women have a higher risk for visual impairment. However our article does not explain why women are more prone to visual impairments and men aren’t. Mo14rnn (talk) 03:45, 16 September 2014 (UTC) Oh and we should defiantly add a section on communication & visual impairments because it does tie right into our course!! :) Mo14rnn (talk) 03:46, 16 September 2014 (UTC)

I think that our article does a really good job at covering many topics that relate to visual impairment. It was definitely well written and I also found it to be very well organized. The information seems very credible and the article is very well sourced. I didn't find any information that would be considered original research. I found that the article was very broad in its coverage and that each of the sections would be easy to add to. For the section based on economic impact, I feel it would beneficial to expand on it and consider economic impact in Canada or North America. The section that is already present in the article that is focused around the United States could also be expanded to include Canada. I agree that the article could definitely include some more images and that we could possibly add some based on the information we add to the page. I agree that we could add a section based on communication with people with visual impairments. I feel that it would be a great addition as it relates to our program, our course, and the article. Taylor McGouran 19:10, 15 September 2014 (UTC)

Congratulations on getting started. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 21:39, 9 September 2014 (UTC)

Alright I'm pretty sure we're supposed to discuss our editing assignment on here, so here goes nothing. I did a quick read through just to familiarize myself with our page and the article seems pretty legit so far. I believe it follows most of the rules for the "good article criteria" but is lacking slightly in images. There is tons of verifiable content on this page considering there are forty two references integrated into the text. The editors have this article written well considering the range of the vocabulary they use in respect to the context. I also noticed they had a section specifically to what visual impairment is considered in the United States. I'm not sure if that's "too" specific but we could always expand and even add a Canadian section or what not. If not it's whatever I'm just spitballing here. Also I agree with what Lynn said about adding a section on communication. Considering we are in a nursing communications class that would make the most sense to me. If you guys have any more ideas that would be great because I'm not sure what else we could talk about. Brett McAllister

Hey guys so of course I didn't write in the right section. So I read through the article, Visual Impairment and there are a few things I would like to add:

First, I think the article would be more visually appealing if there were more pictures. Right now, there is only one picture, a visual representation of farsightedness. Maybe we could put in more diagrams of different types of visual impairment, like the farsighted diagram, so that the visual learners who read this could get an idea of what it looks like.

Second, I noted in the Cause section, that some of the causes have a definition, and others do not. Now, I know that you can click on the link to further research the cause, but I think it would be helpful if we can add a simple definition to each of the causes.

I also think that Epidemiology can be expanded. At the moment, it contains limited information, and I think it can be extended with more stats and research about the age, gender and geography.

One last thing. In the Treatment section, under the ‘Other Aids’ subtitle, I would like to add information about seeing eye dogs. When I read the subtitle of ‘Other Aids,’ it immediately came to my mind, and then I realized that it wasn’t part of the article, so that can also be extended.

Sp14ud (talk) 03:02, 17 September 2014 (UTC)

Setting goals and coming to a consensus on plan
Okay so I think one thing we all definitely agree on doing is adding more pictures. We also have to think of what exactly we're going to add for the communication section. I think we should put a focus on communication with visually impaired clients or patients. I also really liked Sydney's idea of adding something about seeing eye dogs because I think they are used somewhat as a communication tool for visually impaired people. Tm13wg (talk) 22:47, 23 September 2014 (UTC) 18:47, 23 September 2014 (UTC)
 * Great to move on to setting goals for yourselves. You could use information for health professionals (about communication with visually impaired clients/patients) but I think you'd need to figure out what is relevant about communication with persons who have a visual impairment in general (because of the general audience and it not being something that necessarily makes a person a patient or client. I'm not sure I'm being clear. It's getting late. Let me know if you don't understand what I'm saying. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 03:21, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

I agree with Taylor, I like the idea to put the focus on communication with the visually impaired clients or patients. The article already has a section on optical aids, and we can extend on that, including how the optical aids can help them better communicate with others. Communicating verbally doesn't seem like an issue with persons with visual impairment, however, remember that communication is only 1/8 verbal and 7/8 non-verbal, and it is hard to communicate non-verbally to those who have a visual impairment. Sp14ud (talk) 19:55, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

I think that instead of focusing mainly on client and patients with visual impairment, we should widen our research to visual impairment in the general public. Also I went to talk to Lynn today after class and she strongly advised us to include the Communication Model (Figure 1.1) into our project. Using this model we can assume one or both of the individuals have visual impairments, then understand and explain the obstacles that are faced for both individuals. Lynn also mentioned that we should add visual impairment aids to our communication section, as this would make conversations easier for both someone with or without a visual impairment (things like introducing yourself to the visual impaired person, or ending the conversation with the visual impaired person). Mo14rnn (talk) 21:04, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

Some early feedback from Lynn
You're off to a good start. Just be careful to keep yourselves focused on communication for your research. You may come across information that could improve other parts of the article in the process (and it would be fine to edit with that information) but keep the scope of your goals reasonable for the assignment. You may start your research thinking it will fit with one area and then find that it fits better in another area. That's okay. I'm not sure about whether or not you should add a section and/or see if you can incorporate in other sections. You'll figure that out as you do your research. It would be good to set a goal now but be flexible. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 03:21, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

Organizing
I figure if everyone just adds the ideas under this title, it will save a lot of reading through our reflections on the sight. This way it will be easier to communicate the ideas. Brett McAllister  — Preceding undated comment added 23:32, 23 September 2014 (UTC)
 * I added some headings to help you organize your conversation. Headings and threaded conversation about specific topics might make it easier for you all. Feel free to get rid of my attempts to help you organize. You should do what works for you. The handout and video about talk pages on the student resources page (linked from the course Wikipedia page) might help you as well. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 03:09, 24 September 2014 (UTC)

Citation Summaries
Sydney Payne's Summaries:

'''Towards better communication, from the interest point of view. Or-skills of sight-glish for the blind and visually impaired''' This source is a secondary source article from the International Congress Series by R. Bialistock (2005). Bialistock, R. (2005). Towards better communication, from the interest point of view. or-skills of sight-glish for the blind and visually impaired. International Congress Series, 1282, 793-795. Retrieved from http://resolver.scholarsportal.info/resolve/05315131/v1282inone/793_tbcftiftbavi According to this article, the visually impaired people need to be treated just like any other person – and should not receive special treatment. It explains how we live in a society, which has little understanding of the blind, and rather than changing the attitudes of people’s views on the visually impaired, it would be much more effective to “change the blind and visually impaired people’s attitude towards what is best from their point of view and take the most out of it.” This means that our communication towards blind people has to change. We speak differently to people who are blind than those who are not, and it seems as though people are afraid to talk to those who are blind. The author comes up with a type of language; Blind-gish, or sight-glish. This is the type of communication that babies learn from the beginning of life, communication through their eyes. This comes naturally for babies, however, according to Bialistock, we must teach it to blind babes as well. For example: “when a mother is talking to her child and he turns his face away, she will immediately respond and instruct him to look at her when she is talking to him. If she had done this also when talking to her blind child as well, she would have taught him something about sight-glish.” “At school, teachers do not demand the same behavior from blind pupils as they do when it comes to sighted pupils, even if they teach in an integrative class. They are afraid to embarrass the blind child, to insult him, or to appear insensitive.” This is an example of treating those who are blind with the same attitude we treat those who are not blind. I think this is important to the article because we can introduce the concept of blind-gish and treating those who are blind the same as any other person. Sp14ud (talk) 01:03, 20 October 2014 (UTC)
 * I think would be really great to use in collaboration with any article on communicating with visually impaired patients and people. I know that it would go along well with the article I have that discusses communication and treatment of the visually impaired in regards to health care Tm13wg (talk) 03:59, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

A role for psychotherapy in the learning support of a visually impaired child with emotional and behavioural difficulties This source is a secondary source article from the British Journal of Visual Impairment by Downing, S. (1991). A role for psychotherapy in the learning support of a visually impaired child with emotional and behavioural difficulties. British Journal of Visual Impairment, 9(1), 10-12. doi:10.1177/026461969100900105 http://journals1.scholarsportal.info/details/02646196/v09i0001/10_arfpitcweabd.xml?q=verbal+communication+to+visually+impaired&search_in=anywhere&date_from=&date_to=&sort=relevance&sub= In this article, Downing focuses on visual impaired children’s attitudes or emotional behavior as a type of communication. A study done from 1958-1976, examined the early development of children with a severe visual impairment. This study also examined the children’s primary caregivers, and the communication between them as well. The study shows that “The vulnerability of the child frustrated by the absence of sight seems at each stage to reflect both his increased isolation and his necessarily increased dependence upon the [caregiver].” According to Downing, the results imply that the visual impaired or blind child “will have greater difficulty in establishing object constancy and subsequently may experience unusual difficulty in dealing with his aggressive impulses; this in turn can produce very bizarre behaviour.” This can be incorporated in the Visual Impairment Wikipedia article, as it shows how being blind or visually impaired can affect the communication and emotional behaviors in a child, and how we can come to understand this behavior. Sp14ud (talk) 01:03, 20 October 2014 (UTC)
 * I also think this would go really well when discussing the social aspects of development that can be affected due to being diagnosed as visually impaired at a very young age. I have a lot of information on this topic and I think that it would go really well with Bm14pq's first source. Tm13wg (talk) 03:59, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

Since one of my articles was not a secondary source, I found another one... '''Is My World Getting Smaller? The Challenges of Living with Vision Loss''' This source is a secondary source article from the Journal of Visual Impairment & Blindness by Sue Berger (2012). Berger, S. (2012). Is My World Getting Smaller? The Challenges of Living with Vision Loss. Journal Of Visual Impairment & Blindness, 106(1), 5-16. http://eds.a.ebscohost.com.proxy.library.brocku.ca/eds/detail/detail?vid=45&sid=1d8fcb46-cc9c-494a-8450-1b12e931d85b%40sessionmgr4004&hid=4213&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWRzLWxpdmUmc2NvcGU9c2l0ZQ%3d%3d#db=eric&AN=EJ972698 This article explores the challenges of older adults living with vision loss, and how they participate in leisure activities outside the home. The study used a qualitative research approach and included sampling of persons 70 years or older, living in a city or surrounding urban area, with visual acuity of 20/70 in both eyes. These participants reported that their vision was fair to very poor, they had a vision loss of two years or more, and they reported that their health did not affect their daily activities. The participants reported that the challenges that face visually impaired persons outside of the home make it too much of an effort for them to participate in leisure activities outside the home. Challenging environments such as dim lights in restaurants, and small printing in museums, lack of transportation, feelings of vulnerability, decreased energy, and lack of assertiveness, all are factors in decreasing the ability of the participants to leave their home for leisure activities. The article notes that although leisure activities have shown to decrease depression and decrease mortality, older adults with vision loss do not consider leisure activities to be an essential activity and therefore do not ask for assistance to participate in them. Results show that older adults with vision loss do not participate in leisure activities outside the home, and more must be done in the community to make these activities easier and more accessible for them. Sp14ud (talk) 01:03, 20 October 2014 (UTC)

Brett McAllister's citations:

LynnMcCleary for some reason my fist citation is in a weird box? Can you help me fix this please?
 * Bm14pq, done - there was a space at the beginning of the line. --LynnMcCleary (talk) 21:57, 18 October 2014 (UTC)

1. Psychological and Developmental Assessment was a book I found with a section primarily focusing on the assessment of children with visual impairment or blindness. There were two sections in this chapter that caught my attention, language development, and social skills. I believe these go hand in hand with our communication section because they mention difficulty understanding non verbal communication, and areas that the visual impaired struggle with in regards to verbal context. I found this book to have an interesting perspective on the topic of visual impairment because it is written from a psychological point of view. They go as far to explain different disorders that lead to blindness and why that is. How the child can push past the language barriers and become a more functional member of society. They explain how important non verbal communication is when interacting with other humans and how a child who can not interpret these lacks in reading peoples emotions through body movement. This point ties right in with our course, so I think it would be good if we put something about this in the article. There is also talk about personalities of blind children which does relate to communication because it says blind children tend to refrain from social circles of sighted children, making them not as confident or outgoing when it comes to speaking to sighted children.

2.Visual Impairment in Children and Adolescents is one of the sources I found that has a lot of material on communication and behavior of children with visual impairments. It even has some useful information defining/classifying the different areas of visual impairment. They showed some pretty cool images of what it's like to have impaired central vision, tunnel vision,patchy vision, and several others which I'm sure we could find online to add to the page. I found that this was the most unique information from text as compared to the other sources. They listed off several other forms of blindness and and how much vision is technically lost. I believe in our section we can touch on this a little bit, or even add another heading on the visual impairment page explaining these different forms of blindness. By adding the information and pictures from this text it will definitely improve the depth, and move it one step towards becoming an even better article.

3. Assistive Technology for Visually Impaired and Blind People is an ebook I found giving a lot of information on how assistive technology improves the quality of life in the visually impaired. They get into a lot of detail in the chapter and I believe we can pull out some usable data to back up the importance of visual aids. This novel measures the factors to determine an individual's quality of life. They have models illustrating a visually impaired persons' activities, mobility, communication and accessing information, cognitive activities, daily living, education/employment, and recreational activities. These are determinants of the quality of life, and in order for a visually impaired to person to get the full effect of life, these determinants need to be more accessible through the help of aids. The CAT model, is a model splitting a person's needs into characteristics, social aspects, and attitudes. These three categories are then broken off into the earlier topics spoken about. In order to use a visual aid effectively, they should adhere to all of these needs in order to make a blind person a functional member of society. they http://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-1-84628-867-8_1 Bm14pq (talk) 01:11, 30 September 2014 (UTC)


 * I think that all of your sources would be really useful in creating a section on development in children with visual impairments and that your last source could be a great resource for discussing communication techniques if we wanted to add a section on that. Tm13wg (talk) 03:59, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

Taylor McGouran's Summaries

1. Learning to Communicate: Strategies for Developing Communication with Infants Whose Multiple Disabilities Include Visual Impairment and Hearing Loss.

Chen, D. (1999). Learning to Communicate: Strategies for Developing Communication with Infants Whose Multiple Disabilities Include Visual 	Impairment and Hearing Loss. ReSources, 10(5), 1-10. Retrieved from http://www.sfsu.edu/~cadbs/Summer99.pdf

This is a secondary source article from California Deaf-Blind Services, written by a professor from California State University. It explains the role that infant communication exchanges has on their developing communication skills. With visual impairment and possibly other disabilities, there is no way for the communication process to develop naturally. The article states “an infant (who is totally blind and hard of hearing) may become quiet when her mother speaks to her. This passivity may be misinterpreted as disinterest rather than attentiveness” (Chen 1999). The report discusses ways of overcoming the barriers that a visual impairment may cause in regards to infant communication development. It explains that it is crucial to make use of the communication inputs that are accessible to the infant, such as their hearing, their sense of touch, or scent. This can be related to communication with any visually impaired people. One woman describes using scents with her infant to help him recognize certain daily activities; rosemary for bathing, lavender on his pillow for bedtime. I believe this can be used as a crucial piece of information for developing strategies for communicating not only with visually impaired infants and children but adults as well. Tm13wg (talk) 03:52, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

2. Impact of Visual Impairment on Development

Strickling, C. (2010, October 6). Impact Of Visual Impairment On Development. Retrieved October 19, 2014. Retrieved from http://www.tsbvi.edu/infants/3293-the-impact-of-visual-impairment-on-development

This is a secondary source from the Texas School for the Blind and Visually Impaired and is written by Chris Strickling, an occupational therapist in the department for the aging and disability, he is employed by the Texas School for the Blind and Visually Impaired. This article also discusses the complications that visual impairment can have on the development of infant communication. It divides the development into motor development, self concept, cognitive development, social development, and language development. It goes in depth into how each area of communication can be affected and how severely. The article states how the visually impaired child has an unusual dependence on a sighted person, such as their parents, to help incorporate their environment and how the child must be taught how to construct their world. Even recognition of their parents may be difficult and delayed due to the lack of sight. Overall it describes what exactly is effected by visual impairment and how long the development may be delayed and what can be done to help. Tm13wg (talk) 03:52, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

3. Improving Healthcare Access for People with Visual Impairment and Blindness

Cupples, M., Hart, P., Johnston, A., & Jackson, A. (2012). Improving healthcare access for people with visual impairment and blindness. BMJ (Clinical Research Ed.), 344e542. doi:10.1136/bmj.e542. Retrieved from http://www.bmj.com/content/344/bmj.e542

This source is a secondary source and journal article from the British Medical Journal. The journal article was written by Margaret E. Cupples, a professor from Queen’s University Belfast. She wrote it in co-operation with a consultant ophthalmologist, care-co-ordinator, a head of optometry, and a head of clinical services. This article discusses the fact that visual impairment has the ability to create consequences for health and wellbeing, and that visual impairment is increasing especially among older people. It is recognized int he article that those individuals with visual impairment are likely to have limited access to information and healthcare facilities, and may not receive the best care possible because not all health care professionals are aware of specific needs related to vision. A prerequisite of effective health care could very well be having staff that are aware that people may have problems with vision. Communication and different ways of being able to communicate with visually impaired clients must be tailored to individual needs and available at all times. This article can help to discuss the role that health care professionals can play in the treatment of visually impaired patients. Tm13wg (talk) 03:52, 22 October 2014 (UTC)

Visual Impairment Communication Approach
So I've got a few ideas going under the Communication section in our group sandbox. Feel free to add anything to it! We don't have much time left! Sp14ud (talk) 01:42, 4 November 2014 (UTC) Taylor McGouran and Brett McAllister


 * I added a section about how visual impairment can affect the overall development of communication in infants and children. I hope you all get a chance to look over it and change anything you think is wrong or add anything to improve it. Tm13wg (talk) 05:05, 4 November 2014 (UTC)

Taylor McGouran and Brett McAllister Just to let you guys know, you don't need to sign your posts in the sandbox. Lynn can see who wrote what without you signing it :) — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sp14ud (talk • contribs) 13:24, 4 November 2014 (UTC)

Questions
Hey guys, I added this section for us to ask each other questions about the assignment.

I have a question... For this week (October 1) the timeline says we need to identify 3 unique, credible, relevant secondary sources. And then on the 22nd of October, we summarize them and contribute to group discussion. What does that mean we have to do for this week? Do we just find sources? Or do we also have to post them in our talk page.. like Taylor did? Sp14ud (talk) 17:11, 29 September 2014 (UTC)


 * I was kind of confused about what to do with them so I just posted them to be safe. Tm13wg (talk) 22:36, 29 September 2014 (UTC)
 * You should be working on summarizing the information that's relevant for the Wikipedia article from your sources. You have to post summaries and have discussion among your group about them by the 22nd. To have time for discussion and figuring out what to put in the article, you need to get your summaries posted relatively soon. LynnMcCleary (talk) 00:21, 7 October 2014 (UTC)

Should we make a new heading for our summaries and discussion? Sp14ud (talk) 02:15, 19 October 2014 (UTC)

Professor advice about summarizing and collaborating
Mo14rnn, Taylor McGouran , Sp14ud and Brett McAllister, you’ve got lots of information with these sources. Some of your sources have way too much information to summarize. You’ll need to focus. I have some suggestions for you for your next steps – to help you keep your work manageable and within the scope of this assignment. Keep your expectations of yourselves reasonable and keep your focus. If you’re not clear about what the group goals for editing are, check in with each other. Thinking about the communication model we learned in the first week of class might be helpful.

See the course page for information about your tasks due October 22.

Your summaries should be between 250 and at most 400 words for each source. Try not to make them long. If there aren’t 250 words worth of information in your source, don't blather on to fill space – but I don’t think this will be the case for you. I am looking for summaries I can understand and that are logical and coherent. You'll need to really focus in on the heart of the relevant findings. You should be aiming to tell your group members what the key messages are in your sources and how you think the information fits or doesn't fit with the article (it's okay if you logically determine that it wouldn't add to the article). If there is repetition within your sources, you should note that. Hopefully there is. Each summary should have a citation that is acceptable for Wikipedia and that has the information needed for a reader to verify your interpretation by finding your source. Links that only work within the university aren’t user friendly for me or your group members. If there is information that you can’t paraphrase, indicate quotes with quotation marks and page numbers.

When you've got your summaries done, hopefully there will be some themes and repetition among your summaries. Your job then is to collaboratively decide on what deserves to be suggested as an edit for the article and craft summaries of what your group found that could be incorporated in the article. That might be citations for information that is already there or new information. Discuss why your new information is relevant to the article.

I can copy your article over to your sandbox so you can practice editing before you make any suggestions to the editors of the wikipedia article. If you want me to do that, let me know by email or by using my user name in a response to this post. As always, I'm available to guide you.

Don't forget to sign your posts. I look up your contributions by user name for grading. If you don't sign your posts, you won't get credit for them when I'm grading.LynnMcCleary (talk) 01:24, 10 October 2014 (UTC)


 * Should we make a separate heading for our summaries? Sp14ud (talk)! — Preceding undated comment added 15:00, 19 October 2014 (UTC)
 * I think that would be a good idea ! I'll add one in below our citations section Tm13wg (talk) 22:48, 19 October 2014 (UTC)