User talk:Muffin110/sandbox

Good progress, more work left
Dear Mr Teklu

Good progress. Your academic sources are fine but FN citations not in proper format. Text is too short. Do you have more to write, or is that all you can get from your sources? Not clearis there an existing article? Giving you 15 points so far. DH--DHertzGSR (talk) 15:35, 20 November 2018 (UTC)

Lots of work left
Dear Mr Teklu

I have checked the original article and I don't understand how you intend to improve it. Your footnotes are badly in need of editing. Please see me immediately. DH--DHertzGSR (talk) 13:40, 27 November 2018 (UTC)

Are you still enrolled in the course?
Dear Mr Teklu

You have a lot of work ahead of you and have not seen you in class. Please advise. DH--DHertzGSR (talk) 15:29, 4 December 2018 (UTC)

Glad to see you are working
Dear Mr Teklu

Big improvement. Please copy your article draft and put it in a word document, then take it to the Teaching and Learning Commons for appointment with staff, and have them send me an email when they sign off on the quality of your prose. I suggest you reverse the order of the biography [put first] and the career [second.] We need more historical basics, including his birth and death dates, where he lived, etc. More about the general conditions of slavery and of the ruling administration of the country/region where he lived. Arab Slave Trade does not need caps, need to rewrite for clarity. You have a bibliography and footnotes. Either consolidate them or designate them as two separate reference sections. Check existing Wiki articles for format. You have until midnight M Dec 17th to finish this. Please email me at hertzd@gmail.com when you are ready for me to take another look.

good luck

DH--DHertzGSR (talk) 19:40, 12 December 2018 (UTC)

Partial points awarded
Dear Mr Teklu

I see lots of improvement, but a in its current form this cannot be published. Giving you 25 out of the total 30 points possible. DH--DHertzGSR (talk) 19:30, 18 December 2018 (UTC)