User talk:Nafiskabir000/sandbox

MECH 2960 Instructor Review
Thanks for trying to add to the article. Here are my suggested edits for the article:

Background section:
 * I am confused, what is the background section supposed to be about? This article is called "KS Steel", which is a steel material.  This whole background section is about the company.  Why?  It does not seem relevant to the topic.  We need to know more about the material.

Material Properties Section:
 * This section is primarily the history of the steel, rather than the material properties. Perhaps you should re-title this section to say "history"
 * You could then move the material properties (in the last two lines of this section) to a new section that is titled Material Properties
 * What is the "unit weight"? I do not know this term. A general wikipedia search found https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Specific_weight as an explanation ... I would link the unit weight words to this wikipedia article. You need to give the units for the unit weight ... it is 20.3 of what units?

Applications Section:
 * You need citations for each instance of the things and places
 * Your writing needs to be improved for clarity and specificity. As an example, you start the paragraph saying "This is a Los Angeles based structural steel for ..." What does the "this" refer to? It is unclear.
 * Why is the steel chosen for these applications? That is not obvious to me as a reader.
 * The sentences on compensation and benefits for employees is completely inapplicable to the topic of applications. Same with the following sentence on the diverse team. You need to consider the relevance to the topic, and people came to learn about the steel, not the company that makes the steel. Delete those sentences.

UML MECH2960 (talk) 23:05, 11 December 2018 (UTC)

MECH 2960 Instructor Review #2
Thank you for the additional edits. I think that you should upload to live wikipedia just part of your writing, which are the ones that will have the greatest impact hand have the best organization and writing and citation. In your case, I think your history section and materials property sections are good. I have taken some material from the background section to move it to the material properties section. I recommend not including an applications section at this time, and also not including the background section.

If you add the history and materials properties sections to live wikiepdia, then I think you'll be done! UML MECH2960 (talk) 18:19, 15 December 2018 (UTC)