User talk:Paecilaema/sandbox

Hi Letty, So you're editing the Behavior section of the existing Opiliones page right? Does it make sense to structure your article with the anti predator defenses as a subsection under the behavior section since those are mostly all behaviors? Also, are you expanding on the feeding and reproductive behavior that's already there? Those would be good additions as subsections under Behavior too. Good luck with your article! Jenny


 * Hi Jenny. I completely understand your point! I am creating a subsection within the Behavior section. It completely makes sense to add it as a subsection. I will work on changing it. There is already in the wiki page a little information on their diet and reproduction under the Behavior section so I will not modify that section...which it also needs work, but I am going to stick more into working the defense mechanisms...although I will probably add more references to it. We'll see how much I can do, given that it is an already existing page. Thanks for the feedback! Much appreciated.

165.134.212.136 (talk) 21:43, 19 March 2018 (UTC)

Hey! So my comment above was my comment from doing the outline...I just forgot to date it so it looks current. I didn't realize I had comments on my talk page from people critiquing my outline until after I wrote my article too. I just read through your article and it is very thorough. It sounds great and adds a lot of detail to the page. My suggestion is to define what the different types of secondary defenses are a little more for the technical termed ones (like stridulation). Also, differentiating between aposematism and mimcry a little more in the paragraph would help to know the difference. Is there an order to the secondary defenses? I see that chemical is listed last, but you mention it is the most studied, maybe put it first? Great job! Beeology (talk) 05:24, 20 March 2018 (UTC)

Since this feedback is for you and not the original author of the article, I am putting my comments here for you. These are minor things. I also went ahead and made some very minor grammatical changes. In the Anti-predator defenses section, “primary and secondary defenses or mechanisms” could be “defense mechanisms”. The 2nd half of that same sentence says “…that range from morphological such as body armour, behavioral to chemical.” Maybe the following would be more clear. “that include morphological (such as body armour), behavioral, and chemical defense mechanisms.” In the Crypsis section where it says, “by covering with secretions and debris from the leaf-litter” I might say “self-secretions” so it doesn’t sound like the secretions are from the leaf-litter. The first sentence in the “Bobbing” section is in a confusing order. In the section “Stridulation” where it says. “Multiple species within the Laniatores and Dyspnoi” maybe add “orders” afterwards. In the “Chemical” section you can remove “Multiple studies prove that”. Great job. I think this is a very interesting, helpful, and substantial addition to the original page!Fisherman!7 (talk) 03:17, 7 April 2018 (UTC)