User talk:PimpDaddyPeaches/Pausanias (general)

1.   The Lead Section 2.  Clarity of Article Structure 3.  Coverage Balance 4.  Content Neutrality 5.  Sources
 * The information provided in the Early Life section coincides nicely with the lead, transitioning into a timeline-like story of Pausanias. Since he was a general and the lead speaks of this and his victories at Plataea, the military life section also ties in with the lead well, I feel the information on the victory at Plataea is a little redundant with what is already said on the page in the military service section.
 * The sections are clearly labeled and organized well, it will fit alongside the rest of the page well.
 * The article along with your additions remain on topic and to the point. Very clear and concise information.
 * It seeks to show different viewpoints as there are mentions of Herodotus, however no Persian viewpoints, yet it keeps a neutral tone. No particular points of view are forced.
 * The information presented is backed well by reliable sources (Herodotus' Histories and Xenophon). Having more than one source is good to have more than one point of view, the sources are cited correctly.

Yautja199 (talk) 05:43, 28 May 2021 (UTC)Yautja199

The contributions you made to the article are neutral and do not persuade the reader. The references you used of "Xenophon, Constitution of the Lacedaimonians, chapter 4, section 6". www.perseus.tufts.edu. Retrieved 2021-05-20. and Herodotus. The Histories 9.10. seem to be good sources. I think the content you added about the early life of Pausanis contributed to the childhood of Pausanias in how it described the life of what normal spartan boys would experience and how royalty did not make him exempt of participation of training. 6	Early Life Pausanias like all Spartan citizens (Spartiate), would have gone through the intense training from his early childhood at the age of seven and be a regular soldier until the age of thirty. Pausanias was from the royal house Agiads, and even with royal blood and belonging to the one of the royal families that did not exempt him from going through the same training as every other citizen. As every male Spartan citizen earned their citizenship by dedicating their lives to their Polis and its laws. War Service Herodotus concluded that "Pausanias the son of Cleombrotus and grandson of Anaxandridas won the most glorious victory of any known to us". This sentence needs a citation. A suggestion that might be useful is to mention who Herodatus was and their relationship with Pausanias. This sentence is full of useful information that contributes to the content under "War service", but it is missing a citation. It might be useful to have a follow up sentence about the importance of Pausanias's actions in the military and what effects they had. "After the victories at Plataea and the Battle of Mycale, the Spartans lost interest in liberating the Greek cities of Asia Minor until it became clear that Athens would dominate the League in Sparta's absence. Sparta then sent Pausanias back to command the Greek military."

The contributions you made to the article are neutral and do not persuade the reader.

The references you used of "Xenophon, Constitution of the Lacedaimonians, chapter 4, section 6". www.perseus.tufts.edu. Retrieved 2021-05-20. and Herodotus. The Histories 9.10. seem to be good sources.

I think the content you added about the early life of Pausanis contributed to the childhood of Pausanias in how it described the life of what normal spartan boys would experience and how royalty did not make him exempt of participation of training.

"Early Life"

Pausanias like all Spartan citizens (Spartiate), would have gone through the intense training from his early childhood at the age of seven and be a regular soldier until the age of thirty. Pausanias was from the royal house Agiads, and even with royal blood and belonging to the one of the royal families that did not exempt him from going through the same training as every other citizen. As every male Spartan citizen earned their citizenship by dedicating their lives to their Polis and its laws.

"War Service"

Herodotus concluded that "Pausanias the son of Cleombrotus and grandson of Anaxandridas won the most glorious victory of any known to us". This sentence needs a citation. A suggestion that might be useful is to mention who Herodatus was and their relationship with Pausanias.

"After the victories at Plataea and the Battle of Mycale, the Spartans lost interest in liberating the Greek cities of Asia Minor until it became clear that Athens would dominate the League in Sparta's absence. Sparta then sent Pausanias back to command the Greek military." This sentence is full of useful information that contributes to the content under "War service", but it is missing a citation. It might be useful to have a follow up sentence about the importance of Pausanias's actions in the military and what effects they had. FishMan312 (talk) 08:10, 28 May 2021 (UTC)