User talk:Pjcchace/sandbox

Hi Remineralization group!

Your Wiki article has great content and organization. Here's some things I noticed when I reviewed it: 1. Citations need to be added to ends of sentences. Use wiki citation instead of scientific (e.g. “(Sarmiento & Gruber 11)” cited in the introduction should be changed to a [1] citation).

2. Maybe explain what OM is (organic matter) in the Remineralization in Sediments section.

3. Add links to other wiki pages!

4. Consider re-wording sentences so that they are more accessible to the general public. You article is well-written and organized, but the writing is very scientific and a bit difficult to read.

E.g. for the intro: In biogeochemistry, remineralization (also “remineralization”) refers to the breakdown of organic matter into its basal inorganic forms[1]. Remineralization is important within ecosystems as it releases the energy stored in organic molecules and recycles nutrients that can then be reused by other organisms [2]. Because remineralization breaks down organic matter, it plays a part in the cycling of the major biologically-important elements such as carbon, nitrogen and phosphorus[3]. Remineralization plays an especially important role in all aquatic settings where it is often the process that provides the most nutrient recycling in the ecosystem[4].

KatieKoalas (talk) 19:11, 1 March 2016 (UTC)

Hi Team,

Agree with Katie, there's some great content included on this page and it looks well organized and clear. Here are some suggestions:

In first paragraph - define basal (what does that mean? Is there another word that can be used that is more layperson?)

Second paragraph - the process receives special consideration in (instead of for) aquatic settings

Can you add a few more general sentences about remineralization in the first section? Maybe how we know about it, what current research is, where it is going on, etc. Just a little more flavor.

Role in biogeochemistry - This is a good section, but it is written in a pretty academic tone, not really a general audience. Not sure if you can edit some of these sentences to make them less wordy and a little more clear. ie instead of "The most common use of the term is in regards to the medicinal and physiological fields, where it is used to describe the development or redevelopment of mineralized structures in organisms such as teeth or bone." you could write "Biogeochemistry is commonly referred to in medicine and psysiology, where it is used to describe..." You also use the same terminology/wording as you did in the first section with this sentence "In particular, remineralization represents the point where organic material constructed by living organisms is broken down into basal inorganic components that are not obviously identifiable as having come from an organic source. " Can you re-write that in a different way? ie 'Remineralization describes the cycle where organic material from living organisms is broken down into fundamental (or elementary) inorganic pieces that no longer resemble their previous organic sources.' I like the last paragraph in this section but feel you could expand it more. Maybe give a few brief examples of current research to help readers get a sense of how this is being put into action.

This is nice and clear, but can you put spaces between the words? On the page they all appear without spaces "Organic Matter + Oxidant \Rightarrow Liberated Simple Nutrients + Carbon Dioxide + Water"

Electron Acceptor Cascade - another nice section, but again, it's worded pretty 'sciencey' and could be a bit more clear. Can you define methanogenesis? Also maybe link to the element pages when you mention each element?

This sentence needs a little more info - It is also important to figure in bioturbation and the constant mixing of this material which can change the relative importance of each respiration pathway.

How do we figure in bioturbation? Or why should we be paying attention to it?

Redox zonation: This paragraph is confusing to me, maybe shorten sentences and make them more concise? There's also a type-o 'certain reactions will be favored over ON others' This sentence is wordy and clunky, can you re-write? Maybe two sentences? "Redox zonation refers to how the processes that transfer terminal electrons as a result of organic matter degradation vary depending on time and space."

Remineralization in the water column section: This is a nice section. Maybe link to the 'carbon' page, 'primary production'

Last 2 sentences could be written more clearly - ie "This process occurs because most organisms need to ingest nutrients smaller than themselves, often by several orders of magnitude. Since the microbrial community makes up 90% of the marine biomass, particles smaller than microbes (on the order of 6-10x) will be utilized during remineralization."

Those are just some suggestions, feel free to use them or not, as you feel appropriate. Nice job!

Jevanswi (talk) 16:57, 2 March 2016 (UTC)jevanswi (Janan)


 * Hello! Very good feedback so far. I only had a couple of suggestions. For this sentence, I would change saying "you" and reword it: "As you move through the zonation of these deep ocean sediments, acceptors are used and depleted." Another thing I caught were references needing to be after the punctuation. We made our page live already and someone on the internet caught it, but a bot went through and fixed it! Right now the last section is formatted correctly, but the sections above are not. Great job! Huynhsa (talk) 17:44, 2 March 2016 (UTC)