User talk:Quelkivean

Drumnadrochit: Saint Andy Watson and the Feud with the Recluse.
[A record of the life of Andy Watson an his history as it was revealed to the world]

Andy Watson, former curator of The Invisible Museum of Drumnadrochit, which sadly closed in 2009, due to flooding which crippled the foundations and financial disruption derived from the recession. The current situation and site of the building is unclear.

Another famous dweller of this quaint little village is the fabled earl of kiln room who is most widely recognised for his stunning wooden palace upon an almighty hill. This staggering place of residence puts the suburbia below to shame, it is a true pinnacle of architecture that stands out vividly from the mundane, flat-packed houses of the valley peasants. It is said that as a child the earl was a recluse who lived solely on the hot beverage known locally as "Coco", it is also rumoured that this one track diet is possibly the source of his incomprehensible genius.

Returning to the curator Andy Watson, much study has been instigated onto his personal history, this due to the many local rumours connected to his person. Andy Watson, the name itself is derived from ancient Mongolian, originally Phandi Waot-soon, meaning Grey Horse Corset. It is known that his reign of blundering destruction began on the grand Mongolian Steppe in the late 900s AD, where he was raised by a perfectly normal family from Sussex. He would move westward throughout his life, single-highhandedly invading small tribal territories and forcing upon them the wonders of dental hygiene.

However his history fades between 1000s and 1600s, with much of the writing of him being destroyed by the Tooth Decay Memorial Society. A few pieces of literature and documents mention him with a variety of names in different languages, which give a brief glimpse of his deeds at this time: in Portugal he was referred to as the 'Great Dimple Tickler', in France as the 'Glorious Tusked Badger', in Wales as 'he whom dines on Cranberries' and in Svalbard as the 'Lead Bucket of Trondheim'. Records of his life return in the 17th century sourced from the Vatican library, detailing how Andy Watson was made the Patron Saint of Thimbles in the year 1648, this on the (false) knowledge of his death in 1643. It was written that he had been awarded this due to him being carried of a cliff into the sea by a herd of donkeys, surviving at sea for two years at the will of the lord and twenty, buoyant slowly rotting donkey corpses. It is said that Saint Andy viewed donkey corpses as good luck from this point onwards and would carry one around his neck at all times. Saint Andy roamed much of western Europe and Northern Africa throughout the 18th and 19th century. He would finally make his place of dwelling Drumnadrochit in 1932, after which he dedicated himself to regarding all humans as cretins. He would build 'The Invisible Museum of Drumnadrochit' in 1992, dedicating it to the snail which spared his life in the late 14th century. A few brief interviews managed to reveal some of the intricacies of his absurd deranged mind, such as his claims that he is followed by a 2,000ft tall beige parakeet, asserting that it is forever looming over him.

September 2019
Hello, I'm Frood. I wanted to let you know that I reverted one of your recent contributions —specifically this edit to Lewiston, Highland— because it did not appear constructive. If you would like to experiment, please use the sandbox. If you have any questions, you can ask for assistance at the Help desk. Thanks. - Frood (talk!) 18:14, 2 September 2019 (UTC)


 * I apologize, your edit was correct and that content shouldn't have been there. - Frood (talk!) 18:27, 2 September 2019 (UTC)