User talk:Qwertyuiop4212001/sandbox

Missing Materials/Other Suggestions/Review
Overall, I think your article has a good basis, and for the first peer review it's in a good place. There is definitely a lot of information that can be added, but I can see how it would take time to get that information. (Is getting the early life and education difficult?) I would suggest combining your summary sentence with the intro section. Adding in a picture would be helpful, and I think if you go to the library you might be able to find a picture to use if you can't find one online.

The introduction section of the article I think can include more to summarize the entire article as a whole. I like how your entrepreneurial career section relates to his abolition work. To improve that section, I would recommend breaking up the text so it isn't one big paragraph. There's a lot of information so it can be overwhelming to look at.

For contributions to abolitionism, I would recommend introducing how his work and what he was involved in contributed to his work in abolition as a whole (just to make that introduction section more clear).

In family do you have anything about his family growing up or parents?

How did he die, and what legacy did he leave?

Overall, the article is pretty good so far!

Glikespink (talk) 13:38, 2 November 2018 (UTC)

Minor Edits :)
You do not need to repeat the definition of the New England Freedom Association. Word choice when describing clothing trends "Cassimere, Docskins, Tweeds and Vestings". Also, should these be capitalized? Comma after brother-in-law. The last sentence in contributions to abolitionism seems very general. Sections in contributions to abolitionism? Is it necessary? It could probably flow nicely without sections. Bluemilkcat (talk) 13:39, 2 November 2018 (UTC)bluemilkcat