User talk:Rcgsu/sandbox

Feedback on draft: Good start on a draft here with many good sources/citations. The two most important things I think you could do to improve this draft: (1) Revise for logical order: As currently put together, the section jumps between politics in various places (East Pakistan, Pakistan, and India) and situations that predate the cyclone and come after the cyclone. I think reordering the content to make causal links clear (in terms of time/chronology, space/geography, and causation) will help a lot. (2) Revise for language and tone: many of the adjectives and adverbs appear to convey opinions instead of facts. For example, the first sentence of the section: "The 1970 Bhola Cyclone was a major natural disaster that greatly affected Bangladesh politically." Would be clearer and more objective in tone rewritten as: The 1970 Bhola Cyclone was a major natural disaster that had numerous political affects in Bangladesh. --Drbgsu (talk) 17:09, 28 February 2017 (UTC)