User talk:Rezuschlag/sandbox

Great job! Your draft was really interesting. You stayed neutral which is pretty easy when writing about mice and you incorporated sources well. I would work on a few minor issues, one being that your lead is mostly about how the mice look and their physical traits. It may benefit you to put a senate about each topic you wrote about, it can be vague considering the reader gets more information in the actual subtopic. Your coverage was pretty stable which is awesome. Your article may benefit from a final sentence in the endanger category about the future of silky mice. Overall you did a great job and I really like the way you added a photo! Hallehoward (talk) 17:22, 11 October 2016 (UTC)  — Preceding unsigned comment added by Hallehoward (talk • contribs) 17:20, 11 October 2016 (UTC)

I enjoyed your draft and tone throughout the article. The only problem I have is the grammar since you use commas and oxford commas when they're unneeded. Such as "between 65-80 millimeters, with," "grey fur on their backs, and white fur", and "burrows during the day, and go searching." I also loved how you added a picture to add some context. I feel like the description section could a bit stronger in sentence structure. Other than that, you did a good job. Klombela (talk) 23:27, 17 October 2016 (UTC)