User talk:Rlair/sandbox

Images -check Campbell County library/site for historical sites/maps -Department of historic resources -World Cat -Link out more -Don't rely on one source as much
 * Make these changes for 2nd draft

Campbell County Draft Peer Review
You have a lot of good information and it is easy to read/follow. I just noticed that your current lead is repeated in your history section. Personally, I feel the information given in the lead fits better with the history section. I would just give some broad facts about Campbell County in the lead such as where it's located/ what county surrounds it, the population of the county, cites of the county, etc. I also noticed that your citations start with 2 in the text. — Preceding unsigned comment added by MHorchak (talk • contribs) 13:39, 21 February 2019 (UTC)

Instructor feedback on article draft
You have some great content here, Rebecca. It will greatly enhance the history section of the page. Have you thought about trying to add some additional subsequent history, at least as a mention? I know you don't have time to write the entire thing, but it would be good to think about filling out the 200 years between the founding and now, even if it is just bullet points or a paragraph. *tried looking couldn't find anything further current than 1907, will do more research later.*

You also have some good sources. Consider consulting with histories of Lynchburg since their early history is linked.

Work on polishing your writing, too. You have a few grammar errors and at least one run-on sentence. Here are a few other items that came to mind as I was reading your work:


 * Need to clarify the last two sentences in the first paragraph. I'm not sure what you're trying to say about the ports and it is not clear how this relates to religious freedom. *done*
 * Need to clarify the relationship between the county and Lynchburg. In one place, Lynchburg was formed out of the county in 1786 and in another Lynchburg and Campbell became separate in 1878. *done*
 * What is the significance of a "school fair" or at least the first one? *done*
 * If you are keeping the list of participants in war, shouldn't you also include more recent wars? *done*
 * The religion component is a good one. Shouldn't that be under history? Unless you are planning to do something with religion to the present. *done*
 * Who is Sarah Clark Lynch? Note the Lynchburg connection when speaking of the Quakers. *done*
 * There is no need for multiple references to the same source in one paragraph. Look at the examples of other Wikipedia pages to see how they manage references. *done*

Overall, good job. I can't wait to see how it looks after you add images and polish up the writing.

dddonald (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 14:53, 26 February 2019 (UTC)

Rlair (talk) 14:26, 28 February 2019 (UTC)

Article Page Update
Rlair (talk) 07:19, 4 March 2019 (UTC)
 * new information and edits applied to live space
 * New images added
 * new links added