User talk:RoseHarris2020/Blue Nights

Instructor feedback 4.22.2020
Loving your reception section especially; you do a really nice job summarizing the critics' responses, including brief quotes from them to exemplify their takes.

The background section feels a little muddled; that first paragraph reads more like a play-by-play of the events of the memoir than an encyclopedic description of Didion's life.

Could you break that up into several paragraphs, maybe, each with its own topic sentence? I'm thinking about a paragraph that begins something like, "Didion and her husband John struggled with fertility and adopted Quintana in 1966," another that begins with your sentence, "During her early years, Quintana struggled with the knowledge of her adoption," and another that begins, "Quintana developed a severe illness." Or similar.

A couple stylistic recommendations:
 * Ideally your paragraphs shouldn't be bullets here
 * Put your citations after the end punctuation of a sentence (so, "children.[1]")
 * In a few places, you've got some "blah blah is that" openings that could be shortened for better encyclopedic style. For instance: "It was in the early hours of March 3, 1966, that Joan and John..." could be "Early March 3, 1966, Joan and John..." And "To the surprise of everyone, it was Joan's husband John..." could be simply "Yet Joan's husband John..."

Elizabeth.f.chamberlain (talk) 15:48, 22 April 2020 (UTC)

Peer review
Hey, Rose! I have posted your peer review for your article. I outlined particular strengths of your additions and added minimal ways you could improve the article. I know that Joan Didion is one of your favorites, so I can't wait to see your talent and craft shine through in this article and topic that is important to you. Wish I could tell you this in person, but alas, COVID-19. Ha. Let's have coffee on Skype soon. Good luck with the rest of the writing process!

SamMeurer (talk) 20:35, 22 March 2020 (UTC)SamMeurer