User talk:Royer PLU/sandbox

Royer's Peer Review

1. The article Beni Lar has little in terms of actual biography. Where did she come from? Why is she fighting for these causes she's advocating? What led her to be who she is today? Mostly, the section is just about her career and what she has done, which is great, but not totally complete yet. Thus, it would be beneficial to find background information about her.

2. Changes I would suggest applying is the "quote" section. I'm not sure how important the quote that it needs to be standalone and have a separate section. It could be used as a centerpiece or as evidence for what she is fighting or.

3. The most important thing to do to improve the article is to have headings to divide sections so that it organizes information and have a "flow" structure. All that information is in your Sandbox, all it needs is to be put together.

4. One thing that I liked that you mentioned in your Sandbox that I will used in my article is to apply media photos to make my Wiki page more engaging and impactful. Such as, a photo of a protest or an organized gathering.

a. Lead - Good lead. Reveals current and relevant information of Lar; who she is, what she is known for, and what she is doing right now.

b. Structure - No clear structure as of yet, mainly articles listed and their notes and information that will be used to construct the layout of the Wiki Page. A good start that just need to be organized in a flow.

c. Balancing Act - Summary/notes in response to the sources are well represented and document the points of the preexisting articles.

d. Neutral Responses - Rough draft makes a claim on a behalf of an unnamed group; "...although some argue that it was...". Adjust to name unnamed group. In addition, adjust writing to sound more factual, straight forward, and to the point.

e. Reliable Sources - Sources are accredited; ending in "gov", "edu", and "org". Youtube video is valid because it is Bendi Lar speaking. Links are attached to writing for evidence and proof.

Overall, information is present, it just needs to be put together. Nice job!Havenxshowit (talk) 05:09, 15 November 2018 (UTC)