User talk:Shahaan96/sandbox

Jenlorenzana (talk) 19:59, 16 November 2020 (UTC)
 * Overall, I really liked how your page was easy to read and very 'average person' friendly. It made reading about the disease enjoyable.
 * I think including a bulleted list for your signs/symptoms would create a cleaner look and break up some of the wordiness.
 * Including some hyperlinks to other Wiki pages to explain some symptoms or related terms such as Crohn's or NSAID's could be beneficial for a reader who is unsure about those too.
 * There are a few places where you repeat phrases (ex: Till this day) and have some grammatical errors. Reading through the page out-loud could help change some of the words to make it more of a natural read.

--Asomo101 (talk) 01:55, 17 November 2020 (UTC) Asomo101
 * Overall I love how to detail it is and easy to read. I did enjoy reading about the disease.
 * I love the paragraph for your signs/symptoms, but it's nice having a bullet point lists of signs and symptoms. Can keep the paragraph, but just include some bullet points of the symptoms.
 * Also linking some keywords is important to do. I saw a lot of keywords that should definitely be linked.
 * Have more references if possible.

Jvanegas10 (talk) 17:31, 19 November 2020 (UTC)
 * You actually have no highlighted words, go back to your article, and highlight the difficult words. This helps the reader understand them if they don’t know what they mean.
 * In the first paragraph, you can probably delete the sentences where you talk about the symptoms and where the ulcers are found. You can add that information in the signs and symptoms, so it can all flow better.
 * Also, consider writing the signs and symptoms in a bullet point/ list way, this can help the section flow better.
 * In general your sections had a lot of information! Good job in finding all of that, it provided a lot of detail.

--Sweiner02 (talk) 19:46, 23 November 2020 (UTC)
 * Abstract should not have a header. It should start at the beginning, not with a section.
 * All sections need thorough, in-text citations.
 * Link any term that is important or uncommon to its own wikipedia article the first time it shows up.
 * This sentence is confusing "There are multiple causes of Colonic Ulcers but one of the most underseen yet common causes is related to"
 * I would encourage you to work with someone else (possibly the writing center) to go over the writing here. There are a number of grammar and spelling errors, and parts with confusing phrasing that someone else could help you catch.
 * " that we will go more into depth later on in the article." does not belong.
 * Don't quote. Paraphrase.
 * Cause is kind of confusing. Maybe break it up and add subheaders and more info about each.
 * How do NSAIDs cause this? There is a lot more information out there that you can include here.
 * Why do you hide the key diagnostic test in one sentence at the end? That is the most important information.
 * Highly recommended sounds like advice, not encyclopedia. In fact this is really true for the whole treatment section.
 * A quick google scholar search brought up several recent papers. Use them.
 * This really isn't as rare or obscure as you're making it out to be. There is a lot of information out there. Use it, and stop emphasizing the rarity.