User talk:Shanshre

My First Writeup

I was waiting for some one beautiful,the date was right on 6.00..errr did i called it a date....well i'm still confused what was it..it should have been a moment unabridged in itself, a moment as still as the darkest nights..anyway i was right there...fretful as if have to defy time and go back to my Xth std result day....... sometimes it's flabbergasting to know how far human brains can soar and the same can be sometimes pathetically narrow. Anyway at one time i was thinking ..... rehearsing rather......of heaven knows...perhaps a thousand of ways to present myself..i was tense damn tense....i smoked my lungs out...for the worse of course....

6.15 where on the earth r u??. did i heard properly..did she told she will meet me here... or was it some other place??..no it can't be..gosh she is taking long...a thousand and one posibilities were passing like a brain wave..say like what if the bus she comes by.....zonked in the midway....why isn't it a possibility??...didn't i experienced it...aren't we are living in an historical era of unlimited of possibility. The old world is dying and a new one has not yet been conceived........ Now such was the melancholy...that i forgot, i'm sitting among the senior citizens...but boy....where on the earth do u have the time to think 'bout the social niceties. from last 20 minutes i'm stuck on the same page, same article, same line and perhaps the same word of the magazine which i was reading...or perhaps trying to.....if only for heaven's sake, for everything and anything's sake....if and only if i would've devoted so much of mind, body n soul...in my school and college days in studies...by now perhaps I'd have established a thousand theories..enough to recreate history..

6.30 gosh..why the time is moving so slow...it seems as if i have gone through right from stone, medieval ages ...nowadays sometime i think was i was and whether i'm still an independent thinker...well i'm to some extent...what influence my mind most....do i make a decision in prejudice...it's only later on I understood that it'a all time game..i'll tell u later 'bout that... ...the watch showed half past six.. and my misery was growing unimaginably per sec. suddenly after a long moment, a train arrived....and within seconds....there were chaos all 'round...if one has to see the fallout of population...the only thing that he needs to do..is to travel in the great suburban trains.. there were faces all 'round with diff. emotions...but i wasn't noticing it today...i was paralysed in thoughts...deeply paralysed...with blank eyes i was searching for my fortune in the crowd...today even i'm not responding to the stares by those bimbos...perhaps.....am getting mature to adulthood??. Now...have u ever seen a horror movie..the trick is to excite every time the scene gets usual or common...there she was...just as i was losing hope...there she was.....and the eyes.....hopelessly looking beautiful...innocent eyes...as timid as a rabbit...and the time stopped...there was a total vacuum inside me...i'm blank.. Absolutely blank...where r the plans...for which i rehersed so much....where r they...I felt choked.. like I felt while delivered an speech(for the first time) in front of a massive audiance...what is happening now..is it a bigger deal??perhaps it was.. she came she saw and she conquered....hi...how r u??...could we eat something or go somewhere??...phew give me a breather...i'm thrilled the next moment.....

what happened later is history...i'll tell u some other day... ....That was a year back...one year passed....a lot has been changed in this one year....I'm getting more and more practical day by day.....and she??................i saw her yesterday...... but is it the same one i met a year back??....ahh..i saw her yesterday on station...rushing for a train which was 'bout to leave..i was there right there but se didn't noticed me!!.....she has put up weight which was expected...........after marraige...looks quite more matured...amazingly athletic(she crossed tracks as she changed platforms)...... quite a lot has been changed except those shinin', mysterious twinkle which is the same as before...the eyes....as beautiful....as catchy....as enduring& loving.....as exciting as ever....and perhaps to remain so forever....all one needs to find solace among them.........

We must learn to take our subjectivity seriously. What we believe in our deepest heart is true and possess real power.

Shantanu