User talk:Stasiaross/sandbox

Peer Reviews
by: Pattiann Piazza 1. Overall, most of the edits have stay neutral which is good to have when you want to add to the page. There was one in the 3rd one where I suggested in #3 in how you can fixed it from sounding biased. 2. All of your edits seem to be sufficient enough, even more than enough. This will definitely help improve to the article that you are going adding to. 3. In this edit, (3rd one) I suggest in change of words in the bolded words as followed: "Along with the "simple" and "complex", there are other terms that help describe the types of stepfamilies. The most popular types are neotraditional, matriarchal, and romantic. Neotraditional is the most common and has both parents sharing the responsibility of the children. In a matriarchal stepfamily, a strong, independent woman is in charge of the family with the stepfather becoming a mentor. Finally, a romantic stepfamily is when the two parents expect the combining of their separate families to run smoothly which is not always going to happen" you could add something like, "which in many cases doesn't succeed'" versus which is not always going to happen due to it sounding like it coming from your opinion. 4. The language of your edits are appropriate to use in the following article. I do feel, just an suggestion though to combined the last two sentences in your 1st edit: ''If the child is an Indian or native person, then the family must specify their importance for the child's cultural background. This means keeping the child's traditions present in their lives.'' with something like: Keeping the child's traditions present in their lives is especially important if the child is Indian or Native American. You don't have to, you can keep it the way it is, it just a suggestion! 5. All-inclusive, the assignment instructions and format have been completed and you have FINALLY made three edits with included citations. GOOD JOB STASIA!!!

Response
Thank you for the feedback. I don't feel that the third edit is biased. In this edit, I don't see it leaning towards one side or another since I don't make any sides present. However, I do agree that I should change the wording at the end of it. I think that by changing it, it will have a stronger impact on the article. There are a couple of suggestions that I can't change, but that has to do with close paraphrasing. If I were to change one of my sentences to "keeping the child's traditions present in their lives is especially important if the child is an Indian or native person", then I would risk getting flagged for it. I will try to change the wording of the sentences to help with the flow of everything. Again, thank you so much! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Stasiaross (talk • contribs) 00:50, 7 May 2018 (UTC)