User talk:Svela01

Bianka Comments - 11/15/2019 10:06 pm
I think your page looks great!! The mechanism page was hefty and explained everything very thoroughly. I also think the symptoms section was well written out. The bullet points in some of the sections helped make the page look less wordy and made it easier to read. Even if I was a random person on Wikipedia, I could skim through the page and get the idea of it. The only part that wasn't as in depth was the "causes" part, and I do acknowledge that it's still technically unknown, making it hard to describe. I was wondering if there were also genetic factors? Or can asthma be triggered by a one time occurrence? Can it ever go away or are you stuck with it forever?

Review
I think you did a pretty good job explaining everything. The one thing I could suggest is maybe adding more references, just so your information doesn't end up as getting marked as plagiarism. Also, if you want to expand on the mechanism/pathophysiology section maybe you could talk more in detail about the SFRP4 gene. And in the diagnosis section maybe elaborate on what the sequence analysis is and maybe add a little more detail to the differential diagnosis section, about how exactly craniometaphyseal dysplasia differs from Pyle disease. Overall, I really am liking your page, so good job!

--Karp246 (talk) 05:41, 16 November 2019 (UTC)