User talk:Vera otter/sandbox

Article Draft Feedback
Revisions needed. Chronophoto (talk) 01:07, 20 February 2018 (UTC) (course instructor)
 * Because Pariah and Mudbound both have their own Wikipedia pages, you should not add much information about them here. Focus on Rees herself. This is an especially challenging article since there is already so much about Rees and her films on Wikipedia.

Ofloofla's Peer Review
Nice work! Your article is clearly structured, easy to follow and understand, and sourced really well. A couple of thing that perhaps could be looked at:
 * In your first paragraph where you wrote, "Rees held an array of jobs, including being a salesperson..." maybe instead, to make it flow a little nicer, you could write, "Rees held an array of jobs, including working as a salesperson..."
 * In the second paragraph in your Career section you wrote, "Both forms provide a different take on the lived experiences of young Black lesbian women in a way that gives the characters depth and power. Both stories of identity, they are not only diversifying the characters audiences enjoy in media, but also providing an authentic expression of these lives". This could possibly be more of an analysis rather than an unbiased/neutral fact?

Ofloofla (talk) 17:49, 26 February 2018 (UTC)