User talk:Veronica George 10/sandbox

Hi, Here's my feedback on your progress so far. It's great to see that you've gotten started making positive changes to your article. It looks like you've added more details about the octopus's habitat range and its venom and that you found new sources for this information. Unfortunantly, it looks like your sources were not added correctly. They show up as "Shibboleth authentication request" when rendered in the references section. Probably you're pasting UW proxy bookmark urls into the reference generator. It will probably work better if you use the raw url. Also, if you're adding academic sources or library books the DOI or ISBN will probably work even better than the url for generating bibliogaphic metadata.

I'm really excited to see how your article will continue to develop! You've added a solid handful of facts to your article at this point and I'd like to nudge you to think about how to expand from here. One thing is that the article right now is pretty much just one big paragraph with a series of loosely related facts. I think that it could make sense to break up this paragraph into 2-3 paragraphs that focus on specific types of information (e.g., the habitat, the toxin). It usually a good idea to look at articles about similar kinds of topics for inspiration about how to organize an article or what kinds of information will be valuable to include. Giant squid is a WP:b-class article that might give you some ideas.

I'm happy with your progress so far. Keep up the good work! Groceryheist (talk) 20:52, 24 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments on Peer Review
Hey, it's awesome to see the great work you've done on this article so far. I see that you have received useful peer reviews from ( link) and left you a comment on your list of planned changes (it seems like he didn't find the work you did on the sandbox page). I hope you will carefully look at 's comments. She left a number of helpful ideas about how to improve the article next. I agree with her that there's certainly more information that could be added to the article, but I also see that you've added a good amount of new information already. Enough, I think, to elevate the quality of the article from wp:stub to wp:start-class.

So I think you're ready to focus on polishing your article. You can always add more information, but I want to encourage you to try out some of the other ways that you can improve the article. I suggest you take a look at my page on polishing your article for ideas for your next round of work on this project. I especially think that doing things like adding wikilinks, "also see" links, categories, and external links are good things to do when polishing an article. I also suggest that you spend some time carefully copyediting and formatting the information you've already added to make it as easy to read as possible while maintaining an wp:encyclopedic tone.

You've also done a good job adding your references. Since the last time that I took a look at your article, you've fixed most of the problems with them, but a couple are showing errors that seem related to the "date" field of the references. See if you can fix that.

One of 's suggestions which I also think is a great idea is to add an image. I caution you to inform yourself about Wikipedia's norms around images and copyright before you go looking for an image. You might find one that's already useable on Wikipedia, but if not, maybe you can take one yourself or find a photographer who'd be willing to upload an image to Wikipedia commons.

Keep up the good work. I'm really excited to see how great the article will be when you're done with it! Groceryheist (talk) 16:57, 4 February 2021 (UTC)

Hi, sorry I was looking at the wrong page and wasn't able to provide better feedback. covered a lot of what I was going to say but just some small things I noticed was the "Lethality/Reproduction" section can be formatted better; there are dates in your sources that need to be checked. Other than that, this was a very informative and interesting page to read about! I like the neutral tone that you use and the abundance of sources. I'm sure it's going to be hard to get a picture of the Octopus but that would just be the icing on the cake, good job. Thekevanator (talk) 18:25, 5 February 2021 (UTC)