User talk:Wohlina/sandbox

I really like this topic and think it is written really well. In addition, this paragraph is fact driven and it goes from being broad to getting more specific. I think that a few more sources can help to expand further and linking to other pages in the paragraph will be really helpful and make the paragraph even better. However, I think that the topic is explained well and I like how you talked about a specific study that was conducted. I think you did a great job! Isabelleshegog (talk) 19:59, 30 March 2019 (UTC)Isabelle

I like how you expressed a variety of platforms that sexualize women in media. This allows the audience to understand that women are not only sexualized on television but also in images, school settings, and much more. One thing I would change is creating a separate paragraph between your explanation of the sexualization of women in media and the example of the study that was done by Courtney Lockeretz. This will allow the audience to apply a specific example to the idea of sexualization of women in media.Fariha34 (talk) 03:10, 31 March 2019 (UTC)

I really enjoyed reading about this topic. Your paragraph is fact-driven and really expands on the topic well. The research you cited is explained really well and linked in appropriate places. You may consider linking another wikipedia page. Additionally, check your grammar. Great Job! Ashleydavidsongwu (talk) 16:37, 1 April 2019 (UTC)

It's looking good so far. However, I think you can add some hyperlinks to specific words such as Courtney and Lockeretz .Koko413 (talk) 16:02, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

I agree, hyperlinks would be a great addition to the article. Examples might also be something to add to the article. I think it would help your argument.SocksOfDeath (talk) 16:05, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

Your work is very good and fact-driven. You can consider add more information to the themes of female stereotypes part and maybe link some hyperlinks to the paragraph. Also, check your 2nd source date.ChristalCao (talk) 16:05, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

It is a great job. I think that if you can add more information which is more closely related to you main point will be perfect. I suppose that the main information and examples will be better if they do not have less paragraph than the description background.Samuelzhao000005 (talk) 16:15, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Samuelzhao000005

Great job so far! One thing I would strongly recommend is adding hyperlinks to correlating Wiki articles. Use specific words from your article to hyperlink to their corresponding Wiki page. Great use of sources! It's great to see that you used so many outside sources in a fairly short amount of writing. It goes to show that you did your research and have constructed a valid and reliable article outlining your chosen topic. Keep up the good work? Jaredgoz (talk) 16:26, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

Would suggest using more hyperlinks! They help readers comprehend articles. On the other hand, it is evident that you have done a great deal of research, so keep up the good work! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Jasonkung22 (talk • contribs) 16:34, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

You forgot to add a hyperlink to the Wiki page/sub-article that you're going to edit. I think you should add more citations to the text, and maybe reformulate the way that you talked about the study by Courtney and Lockeretz (add bullet points). Besides that, you should add mroe hyperkins about specific terms. The paragraph is fact-driven and follows a logic. Good job!!Rafamatalon1234 (talk) 17:42, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

I very much enjoyed reading this article, excellent information and sources. Just add some hyperlinks in, and also maybe include more examples and citations. Charlier118 (talk) 23:51, 5 April 2019 (UTC)

I really liked your piece! I would just add few examples of past media posts or ads that have demonstrated this and perhaps add information on how it is evolving.Lorenaramirezl (talk) 01:17, 6 April 2019 (UTC)

Great job! Make the heading of your paragraph formatted like a heading. Also, try to add some links! Sydneycurrie5 (talk) 20:37, 7 April 2019 (UTC)