User talk:Yonna95/Disability art/Marinarasauce21 Peer Review

I enjoyed your topic and I think you’re off to a really good start. One suggestion I have is to be careful with comma use. There were a couple of times that commas seemed to be overused or a singular comma was not needed. Under “Disability Art”, all three sentences begin with “disability art”. While I don’t think this is a major issue, I think beginning the sentences differently will allow for enhanced flow. Starting all the sentences the same way sounds a little bit like a bullet list. I think the “Themes” section sounds good so far. It has a natural flow of ideas; one sentence leads to the next and it was very descriptive while being concise. I think it could use some grammatical restructuring in each sentence, but nothing too major. The list of disabled artists I really enjoyed reading and I think it’s very good that you added a link to view more artists in the section’s wrap up sentence. The last section has a few grammatical errors to correct, but again, overall, I think this piece is off to a really good start. I think the information provided is concise, useful, and interesting. Marinarasauce21 (talk) 03:18, 5 April 2020 (UTC)