User talk:Yuwei Han/sandbox

Peer review Hello Yuwei, I reviewed the draft of the Dulong language article that you have been working on. I think your draft provides a good foundation for the future article and contains appropriate bibliographic sources that offer a lot of useful and reliable information. However, I do have some suggestions regarding what I assume is the lead section information in your article. I found the last paragraph to be a bit too specific to be placed into the lead section, and I would suggest creating a separate section, such as phonology or grammar, for such information. Also the third paragraph about dialects seems a bit “loaded” with a variety of information, which could be made shorter in the lead section, and again more developed under additional section devoted to a detailed explanation of dialects. In addition, it might be necessary to outline a better connection between the dialects and the four areas where they are spoken. And these notes bring me to a suggestion of adding a table of contents to your future article, which could reflect a variety of useful sections such as history, vocabulary, phonology, grammar, morphology, and many other sections, which are typical for Wikipedia language articles. And most importantly, I would definitely mention in the lead section the status of the Dulong language, whether it is endangered or not. And would include a sentence or two about this language’s written system, or lack thereof, also adding some extra information that would create a general idea about this language. Besides, it seems that there should be a few links made from the lead section to your references, and a lot of material should be paraphrased, rather than quoted from the sources. Overall, I think the tone of the draft for your article is neutral and its information is unbiased, and your draft seems to be a good stepping stone for your final article. Good luck! ReginaMaj (talk) 09:35, 7 April 2017 (UTC)

Hi this is Danielle Nicolosi! First off, when you introduce the Derung language is an unwritten language, try to find more information to explain how the language came about. You give a lot of information about the present language but information about how it started off or originated should be added. I like how you already have sections set up for the different topics. I only fixed little grammatical things because everything else is well written! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Dmn102 (talk • contribs) 17:58, 7 April 2017 (UTC)