User talk:Zipporahm/Gisèle Pineau

Hi Zipporah! I love how you took the initiative to begin your own paragraph. The sentences were cohesive and easy to follow. To improve your work, I would suggest a variation of syntax/sentence structure. 4 out of the 5 sentences have very similar structure with the use of dependent/independent clauses separated by a comma. Also, I would suggest to specify which school she attended as a child if possible. (Ex. In her childhood, she was subject to racism and xenophobia while attending Hyde Park High School, an all-white school in Paris, France) *example only, not an actual school. Jpate2 (talk) 02:21, 27 April 2020 (UTC)Jpate2