User talk:Zmirza716/sandbox

External Review
Hi Zmirza716 - My name is Jolie, and I'm the Project Coordinator for the WikiProject Limnology & Oceanography team. Your external review for your article on the bathyal zone is posted below. If you have any questions about your review, or would like to clarify anything, please feel free to let me know by posting a message on my talk page and I'll pass it along to your external reviewer. Thanks, and all the best as you wrap up your Wikipedia editing assignment!

EXTERNAL REVIEW - Hi Zmirza716, I'm an aquatic scientist based in Canada. Most of my research is in high-latitude parts of North America, where I've studied the physical and chemical characteristics of rivers and coastal floodplains, and how these systems influence near-shore parts of the Arctic Ocean. The underwater light environment and how it's affected by water chemistry is particularly interesting to me.

You've done a good job expanding the Wikipedia page on the bathyal zone. You've added in a lot of interesting and relevant information, and I think with a bit of extra work it will be a really great addition to the page. Here are some specific comments for you to consider as you wrap up your assignment:


 * I think your text will be added to the Fauna subsection of the existing page - is this correct? I think this is definitely the part of the page where it would fit the best.
 * "No sunlight is present so no photosynthesizing primary producers." This sentence is a nice introduction to the rest of what you write, but should be rewritten since it's grammatically incorrect as-is. You could rephrase to "Since no sunlight is present in the bathyal zone, the zone is characterized by a lack of photosynthesizing primary producers."
 * Rather than using the term "creatures" throughout your text, it would be more accurate to say "species" or "organisms".
 * Your two paragraphs have some repetition that could be streamlined. For example, in both paragraphs you mention the two different ways that predators capture their prey (filter feeding and luring prey using bioluminescence). I would recommend restructuring your two paragraphs so that the first one discusses the characteristics and adaptations that bathyal species tend to have due to their environment, and the second paragraph discusses ways that bathyal predators attract their prey. In your second paragraph, you could also briefly discuss some of the unique mating techniques that you mentioned...this would be a really interesting addition!
 * When you merge your new text into the existing article, you'll want to be careful not to repeat any of the info that's already in the Fauna subsection. Do a careful proof-read to make sure this doesn't happen.
 * Your text requires references and in-line citations to back up any statements of fact before it gets published online.
 * Make sure you add cross-links to other Wikipedia pages whenever possible - for example, you could add links to bioluminescence, anglerfish, and monognathid eel. Cross-links allow the reader to quickly and easily access more information, so are a really valuable addition to any Wikipedia page.

Good job, and all the best as you finish your assignment and prepare your page for posting online! I look forward to reading the final version of your page!

JoGDelta (talk) 22:06, 28 April 2021 (UTC)