Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Daisy Jugadai Napaltjarri/archive1


 * The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by GrahamColm 22:16, 7 November 2012.

Daisy Jugadai Napaltjarri

 * Nominator(s): hamiltonstone (talk) 13:16, 23 October 2012 (UTC)

This rather short article is on one of hundreds of artists to emerge from the contemporary Indigenous Australian art movement that commenced in the 1970s. Daisy Jugadai's work is from a small group amongst these artists who represent the landscape in a kind of 'hybrid' style, between the traditional iconography of the Papunya artists, and the realist landscapes of the Hermannsburg School. hamiltonstone (talk) 13:16, 23 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Support based on a read through of content. Quite short, but seems to cover the topic well. Paul MacDermott (talk) 17:25, 23 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Thank you for reviewing it Paul. hamiltonstone (talk) 11:05, 30 October 2012 (UTC)

Comments: Although brief, this article is very readable and interesting, and seems to be comprehensive. There are one or two things which may require further explanation or elaboration, but no major issues that I can see. Sarastro1 (talk) 23:57, 28 October 2012 (UTC)
 * "fine observation of the complex structures of the vegetation and environment": Fine is ambiguous here. Is it meaning "good" which would suggest POV, or fine meaning "close"? If the latter, then maybe "close observation" would work better.
 * changed to "close". hamiltonstone (talk) 04:21, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "operate using a different conception of time": Different to who?
 * Tweaked, though maybe the wording could be improved. hamiltonstone (talk) 04:26, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "may be associated with particular totems": Not sure what totems means in this sense.
 * It has what I think is the everyday meaning, but have wikilinked. hamiltonstone (talk) 04:26, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "Thus 'Daisy Jugadai' is the element of the artist's name that is specifically hers.": Any reason for preferring single quotation marks to double?
 * No. changed. hamiltonstone (talk) 04:21, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * Do we know the cause of her death?
 * Not that I've been able to locate, though i found one more snippet on a major work during my search. I have one more source to check at home but, subject to that, it's a no. hamiltonstone (talk) 03:23, 30 October 2012 (UTC)


 * The first paragraph of "Background" is a little clunky and hard to follow.
 * "Contemporary Indigenous art of the western desert began when…": This seems an odd way to phrase this; how can contemporary art "begin"?
 * Rewritten. hamiltonstone (talk) 04:21, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "However, there was also a desire amongst many of the women to participate…": Do we need "of the"?
 * No. reworded. hamiltonstone (talk) 03:32, 30 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "large numbers of them began to create paintings": Sounds like some sort of group art work, where large numbers of women paint together.
 * Changed. hamiltonstone (talk) 04:21, 29 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "Her works reflect her Tjuukurrpa, the complex spiritual knowledge and relationships between her and her landscape;[21] she also portrayed those of her late husband and late father.": Not quite understanding "Tjuukurrpa" here, in particular how she can portray someone else's. But that could just be me.
 * It's a tricky subject, and I also wasn't sure it was discussed at the correct point in the article. I've added some explanation, and relocated the text to the "background" subsection. hamiltonstone (talk) 11:01, 30 October 2012 (UTC)


 * "Her painting reflects fine observation of the complex structures of the vegetation and environment, its features "obsessively detailed", with the artist "devotedly [including] all the bush tucker of that area", as well as choosing "a time of year in which to depict her country".": In-text attribution? Sarastro1 (talk) 23:57, 28 October 2012 (UTC)
 * There is a cite at the end of the sentence for all three quotes - it would be clunky to repeat the cite three times, no? Or are you getting at something else? hamiltonstone (talk) 04:21, 29 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Yes, sorry! I meant WP:INTEXT; i.e. saying who said it in the text: "According to X...". However, not a big issue if you would prefer not to, as there is some room for manoeuvre in the MoS for quotes like these. Sarastro1 (talk) 09:52, 29 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Ah. Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 02:56, 30 October 2012 (UTC)

Support: An interesting article. All changes look good, and with the qualification that I know little about the subject, I am happy to support. Sarastro1 (talk) 09:38, 30 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Thank you for the review. I also tweaked the tjukurrpa stuff, if you want to take a look. hamiltonstone (talk) 11:05, 30 October 2012 (UTC)


 * Support Comment taking a look now. Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:52, 5 November 2012 (UTC)


 *  A distinguished artist in her community, her death coincided with a period of "brilliant revival" of artistic expression amongst her successors - I'd try and write this without the direct quote.
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:13, 5 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Any other info/critique/commentary on any other paintings at all? If none published in reliable sources then ok, but the article is quite short and would benefit from a bit more on her work.
 * I combed through the references, including one that I had, inexplicably, overlooked. But while I have been able to add a little more information (about geography, administrative role and style), I have found nothing further in the way of commentary on individual works. Unless I happen to turn up something in an auction catalogue (a long shot), I think this is everything. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:11, 5 November 2012 (UTC)
 * I figured it was worth one last look...anyway all good now. Casliber (talk · contribs) 00:51, 6 November 2012 (UTC)

Otherwise looking pretty good....Casliber (talk · contribs) 04:38, 5 November 2012 (UTC)

Source review - spotchecks not done
 * Fn7: ISBN?
 * FN10: pages?
 * FN23: page formatting. Nikkimaria (talk) 04:02, 5 November 2012 (UTC)
 * All of Nikki's points now addressed, I believe. hamiltonstone (talk) 05:32, 5 November 2012 (UTC)


 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.