Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Ghost in the Machine (song)/archive1

Ghost in the Machine (song)

 * Nominator(s): PSA 🏕️🪐 (please make some noise...), Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 14:42, 14 June 2024 (UTC)

This article is primarily the work of PSA, who did a phenomenal job gathering information on this song. They approached me off-wiki last month asking to collaborate on helping to build the article, and we are both of the belief that it is ready for FAC. This song is from SZA's smash-hit album SOS, and while it was never released as a single, it still became the first-ever top 40 hit for its featured artist, the one and only Phoebe Bridgers. Cited by several critics and by SZA herself as an example of the album's experimentation with genres outside of R&B, the song revolves around themes of relationships faltering due to a lack of meaningful connection, with recurring themes surrounding artificial intelligence. I have greatly enjoyed collaborating with PSA on this one, and we both anticipate the community's feedback. (Disclosure: for my part, this is a WikiCup nomination.) Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 14:42, 14 June 2024 (UTC)

Comments from Mike Christie
Oppose on prose. I was the GA reviewer, and I said when I passed it that "the prose is a little awkward in places but I think this meets the GA standards". FA prose standards are higher. Here are a few examples of wording that I think needs to be improved. These are just examples. I'll be glad to revisit if you can get a copyedit and one or two supports on the prose from other reviewers. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 16:00, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "Elsewhere, it appeared on national charts in Australia, Canada, and Portugal." "Elsewhere" is redundant; the list of places tells the reader it's elsewhere.
 * Fixed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "many praised the two performers as a fitting match despite their discographies' different sounds, whereas a few found Bridgers an unnecessary addition". "Fitting match" is redundant; "discographies' different sounds" is an odd figurative use of "discography" -- it's their music that has a characteristic sound, not the list of their music; "unnecessary addition" is a bit vague.
 * I've replaced "fitting match" with "good fit", "discographies' different sounds" with "the differences between their respective musical styles", and rephrased the "unnecessary addition" bit. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "From April to May 2022, SZA told media outlets that she had recently finished the album": strictly speaking this means she did nothing else but say this during that time, which is not what you want to say.
 * Lopped off May, as the source for this sentence is from April. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "SZA created a list of possible collaborators for the album. The roster included artists like": "roster" is not the ideal word; it means a list of people who have a given duty.
 * Revised to merge the two sentences and replace the "roster" clause with "including". Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "Having been categorized as an R&B artist throughout her career, which she believed was because she was a Black woman,[12] SZA sought to prove her musical versatility and combine the R&B sound that had been a staple of her past works[13][14] with a diverse set of other genres and soundscapes." A bit wordy. And we start by saying she thought she was only categorized as an R&B artist because she was Black, and then say R&B was the main genre she had been working in. What does "soundscapes" add here that we don't get from "genre"?
 * I've removed "soundscapes" and had a go at tweaking the rest, though I may make further revisions. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "The turnaround time for completing "Ghost in the Machine" was fast." A time is short or long, not fast (in some usages, such as athletic events, you can say "a fast time", but that's not this usage). I really should have caught this in the GA review.
 * Yeah that makes a lot more sense, I should've caught it sooner myself. Replaced with "short". Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "Time's Andrew R. Chow wrote that she asks for help even if she feels drained from the romance, which he added was one of the album's recurring themes": a bit hard to parse. Does she feel drained from the romance or not? If she does, why "if"?  I think you want "though".  And what is the recurring theme?  Feeling drained from romance?  Or just romance?
 * I've replaced this part with "Time's Andrew R. Chow wrote that there are multiple instances on the album where SZA expresses desire to remain in a relationship despite feeling drained from it, and cited 'Ghost in the Machine' as an example". Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Hi, thank you for the constructive criticism. I believe that I have addressed the specific points you have mentioned (replies inline), and will be giving the article a few combs-through to identify other possible issues with the prose. Cheers, Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 17:29, 14 June 2024 (UTC)


 * Hi Mike, a fair few edits and a couple of supports since you last looked at it. Do you fancy having another run through? Thanks. Gog the Mild (talk) 13:05, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
 * I've read through again and have struck my oppose; I don't think I can support, but I no longer see prose issues as concerning as I did earlier. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 16:55, 7 July 2024 (UTC)

Heartfox
Best, Heartfox (talk) 02:29, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "The lyrics are written" → try getting this out of passive voice, ie "Written in a conversational style, the lyrics express..."
 * Done. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I found it very odd that the songwriters and producers are not mentioned in the lead.
 * Good catch; added to the lede, and will incorporate into the body of the article ASAP. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "Critics primarily focused on Bridgers's appearance on the song" → "In reviews, critics primarily..."
 * Done. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "for their synergy " → get out of wikivoice by converting to "as synergistic"
 * Fixed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "she ultimately won more awards than any other artist that year" → questionable relevance for the lead given the main artist is SZA
 * Nixed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "was a speedy feat", "had its live performance debut" → this doesn't feel professional
 * Rephrased both. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "appeared on the national charts in Canada, Australia, and Portugal" → can't rely on refs in other sections
 * I have to admit that footnote looked odd to me. I've replaced it with direct citations to the sources that were already present in §Charts. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * As a counterpoint - I have always believed that if a given information is cited somewhere in the article, there is no need to cite it again elsewhere in the same article, which is coincidentally the logic behind citations in lead sections. Plus, listing a bunch of peaks in quick succession in one paragraph disrupts the flow and makes the whole thing off to me. This feels like a matter of preference anyway, and I have reinstated the status quo. PSA 🏕️🪐 (please make some noise...) 05:11, 16 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I wasn't saying the article needs to provide the exact peaks, but I don't agree that a note from one section to a different section suffices as a citation. The guidance seems to be mostly about an opening sentence acting as a summary for a paragraph, or the lead acting as a summary for the paragraphs of the article. Heartfox (talk) 18:54, 16 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I'm going to attempt a compromise by keeping the sentence itself the way it is, while adding citations to the footnote. Dylan 620  in public/on mobile (he/him • talk) 20:18, 16 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thoughts? Dylan 620  in public/on mobile (he/him • talk) 20:27, 16 June 2024 (UTC)
 * overall I think there are slightly too many references to the album. context is great but I think some sentences could be cut. Like "She posted the album's track list on Twitter on December 5, 2022." is really unnecessary I think.
 * I've tried to trim some of the references to other songs (thinking it over, I'm not sure if "Kill Bill" needed to be namedropped, let alone twice, though I believe at least one of those instances was my error) and extraneous references to the album itself. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "As a member of Boygenius, she also won Best Rock Song and Best Rock Performance for "Not Strong Enough" and Best Alternative Music Album for The Record" → this level of detail is also unnecessary I think
 * Compacted to remove the names of the awards. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you for the feedback, . I believe that I have addressed your comments. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 18:05, 15 June 2024 (UTC)


 * "or 'a little bit of everything' in her words" → seems unnecessary when the paraphrase beforehand already says the same thing
 * Removed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "In a Billboard cover story published", "In an interview with Nessa of Hot 97", "In an interview for CBS News Los Angeles", "SZA told Alternative Press" → all this seems unnecessary. I don't care where stuff was said, I care about what was said.
 * All instances removed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "In the middle of the demo was an open instrumental section where Bisel thought Bridgers would fit" → Bisel thought Bridgers would fit in an open instrumental section during the middle of the demo
 * Replaced, with an additional small tweak at the end of that sentence. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "was trying to make the feature happen" → informal
 * Replaced with "was trying to arrange the feature". Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * "for escapism, for gratification, to assuage" → for escapism and gratification to assuage
 * Kept the comma after gratification, but otherwise done. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * ", being the most" → rephrasing with a semi-colon would work better
 * Rephrased, with some additional tweaks in the same paragraph. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)

Further comments, Heartfox (talk) 20:12, 18 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Replies inline. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:34, 18 June 2024 (UTC)


 * Hi, I was wondering if you felt in a position to either support or oppose this nomination? Obviously, neither is obligatory. Thanks. Gog the Mild (talk) 13:02, 7 July 2024 (UTC)
 * I'll support but I do think the article would benefit from more input from other editors. Heartfox (talk) 03:49, 8 July 2024 (UTC)

Comments from Joeyquism
I'll get to this sometime soon (likely within the next few days, I'm a bit burnt out right now). Thank you for the review(s) of Windswept Adan, by the way! Consider this my way of paying you back. :) joeyquism (talk ) 19:14, 15 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you, Joey, and you're welcome! It was a pleasure to review. Take as much time as you need :) Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:30, 15 June 2024 (UTC)

@Dylan620: Hello again! I've noted some of my concerns below; feel free to refuse with justification:


 * - Is this clause particularly relevant? I feel that the same information is conveyed or to some extent implied by the preceding clause (After numerous delays). I'd suggest removing it, or rephrasing it to where it does not sit awkwardly in the middle of more pertinent information.
 * Another user already rephrased this as "after three years of delays", which I think is an improvement. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I saw this; the wording looks better. joeyquism (talk ) 23:02, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - Would it be worth it to note if "Ghost in the Machine" falls into any of these descriptions? I've noticed the gradual buildup to the mention of the subject, and while I do find it engaging, I feel as if this is sort of extraneous as it stands, as there have been no mentions of the track prior to this sentence. That being said, I recognize that it does provide more context as to how SOS sounds.
 * I've added another citation to support categorizing "Ghost in the Machine" as a ballad and removed "heartfelt" as not mentioned by the source (even though I'd personally describe the album that way). Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Looks good! joeyquism (talk ) 23:02, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - I feel like this is a different way of wording "In his opinion, [...]". I'd personally avoid this kind of phrasing by indicating that the following text is something that he wrote, and is not something that readers should take as fact, which is how it reads to me right now (I acknowledge that I cannot speak for others here). Something like "Writing for Variety, A. D. Amorosi wrote that the production..." would suffice.
 * and is not something the readers should take as fact – this is intentional, as I wanted to convey that it was Amorosi's opinion that the production sounded like those instruments (neither of which are mentioned in the credits). Nevertheless, I think your suggested phrasing works better, although I did replace Writing for... with In a review of SOS for... so as not to use "writing" and "wrote" only a few words apart in the same sentence (with respect to your mention of WP:ELEVAR below, which I found enlightening). Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Looks good. joeyquism (talk ) 23:02, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - Remove "together"(?)
 * Yeah that's tighter and more flowy, removed. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - This is sort of just my personal preference, but I'm not a fan of short sentences. If they're not at the beginning of a paragraph (in which case, I would encourage them, as they punch a lot harder), they disrupt the flow of the reading experience. I'd suggest conjoining this with the following sentence through a semicolon, or breaking the paragraph it belongs to in two with this sentence being the first.
 * I like the semicolon idea; implemented. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * The Alternative Press article states that "SZA wanted to weave in the voice of a 'highly conversational' person, or as she explains, someone with a conversational approach to their music like Mac DeMarco, Connan Mockasin or Kevin Parker of Tame Impala." Do you think this warrants inclusion in the article? This seems like valuable information for describing the conversational style of the lyrics. Let me know your thoughts on this. Do note that I did not do a spot or source check; I initially checked this link out to see if there was more to the quote "I feel like there's so much debate about what's good, what's bad, what's this, what's that?"
 * I think this could be worth including, though I'm not quite sure where. Maybe in §Music_and_production, where Bisel suggests to SZA that she invite Bridgers to feature? The Alternative Press article certainly implies this to be a reason that SZA felt like Bridgers would be a good fit. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I think your instinct is correct here. I'm thinking perhaps some integration with the sentence ; perhaps before or after would be alright too.
 * Replaced the period with a comma and added having sought to include a "highly conversational" guest musician such as Bridgers. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 23:29, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - I think this reads strangely, but I'm not sure of how I would amend it. Leave it be for now, but I just wanted to note that I didn't think this phrase flowed very well.
 * I got rid of the online drama clause because it felt redundant to part of the paragraph directly above it, and replaced sings about wanting... with yearns for... . Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - Can be conveyed more simply as "the song peaked at number 17"; I'm citing WP:ELEVAR here. Not trying to attack, but don't be afraid to use the same term twice within close proximity of each other at the expense of sounding a bit like you're droning; I struggle with this as well at times.
 * As I alluded above, I had not previously considered that "elegant variation" could be a problem, but I totally understand where you're coming from. I've edited the sentene to reuse the "debuted and peaked" wording. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * - "For" can be replaced with "of", or the clause can be phrased as something like "For The Quietus, CJ Thorpe-Tracey wrote that he felt..."
 * Of-ified. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)

I have definitely not adhered to the "no style policing" expectation, but I do feel that some of the prose can be improved to further benefit the reading experience; additionally, most of the concerns that I had before were addressed by the other reviewers and corrected. Overall, I think it reads quite nicely; it just needs some touch-ups to really flow. I'll let you know if I have any further comments; as of now, I have no established position on where I stand for support or oppose. As always, feel free to let me know your thoughts with a reply. Hope you're having a great weekend, and I look forward to hearing back from you soon! joeyquism (talk ) 21:23, 16 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you for your feedback Joey :) I hope you had a great weekend too! I'll start working to address these comments after I get home later today. Dylan 620  in public/on mobile (he/him • talk) 08:05, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Hi again Joey, I think I've addressed everything – replies inline! Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 22:42, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you for your edits, Dylan620! I have left one more comment above regarding the placement of the SZA quote from the Alternative Press article; once that is addressed, I'll read over the article a few more times and likely support. Thanks, and have a great rest of your day! joeyquism (talk ) 23:02, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you Joey, hope you have a great rest of your day as well! I've replied to your comment above. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 23:29, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Looks a lot better! Support on prose review. joeyquism (talk ) 23:31, 17 June 2024 (UTC)

Support from Hurricanehink

 * So you don't mention anything about the song's chords, which is just two chords - Gb major 7 to Ebminor (sometimes Eb major). Can you find any references to its chords or tempo, as in beats per minute? It feels like a steady tempo throughout the whole song.
 * Unfortunately, I can't seem to find any sheet music uploads by the song's publisher. I did find this at musicnotes.com, but it's an arrangement by a third party, which I assume doesn't pass muster for inclusion (though of course I hope I'm wrong here). Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Dylan pretty much said what I was going to say. Musicnotes.com composition is not guaranteed to be the same composition as the original studio version's, so the information was decisively left out. - Elias
 * And there are no reliable sources out there that can at least describe the beats per minute? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 21:22, 27 June 2024 (UTC)
 * From the searching I've done, the tempo appears to be 125 BPM, though I'm not sure if SongBPM or Tunebat would qualify as reliable sources. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 14:42, 4 July 2024 (UTC)


 * I guess I gotta ask, where is the sourcing for the credits?
 * The liner notes for the vinyl; I've added a ref. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * This was addressed at GAN: "credits are assumed to be cited to the album's liner notes, which WP:ALBUMSTYLE tells me usually does not need an explicit citation". I have removed the citation accordingly. - Elias
 * Then for the sake of fact-checking it, could you link the album's liner notes? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 21:22, 27 June 2024 (UTC)
 * It took some digging, but I've found an image on Discogs where the text is clear enough to be of use for verification.


 * All in all, the writing is pretty good in my opinion.
 * I also used a random number generator to spotcheck references.
 * 37 - I don't know if this reference accurately. It doesn't mention " she believes has been overtaken by self-centeredness and lack of empathy. ", nor does it mention that Sadhguru was "the founder of the Isha Foundation". Otherwise the reference seems formatted fine.
 * I mulled over whether to cite the Isha Foundation tidbit to a Vox article linked in the source, or to remove it outright; I opted for the latter because at the end of the day I'm not sure how relevant it is to the topic at hand. (, feel free to correct me here.) I've also removed the sentence you quoted (partly per your concerns, and partly because I think it might have been a little redundant to the sentence before it) and moved the paragraph break to start the next one at "The song also discusses artificial intelligence". Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * This is a WP:SKY/WP:NOTCITE situation IMO. Namedropping Sadhguru without context because the description would otherwise have to be cited is like saying I should cite that SZA is an American singer-songwriter in the prose for GiTM. The articles about those people already cover those descriptors. - Elias
 * 40 - "The lyrics were interpreted by publications as being about her then-boyfriend, Irish actor Paul Mescal" the references more hint it was a breakup. Was it?
 * Yeah, it doesn't seem to have been confirmed at the time, but a breakup it was. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * 46 - this reference doesn't cover the information at all, which is supposed to be about the album being released on 12/9/2022
 * This had been a supplementary reference for the "three years of delays" clause of that same sentence - I've pulled the ref (and a couple more) forward to that comma. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * 56 - the source says "Versatility largely wins out. Only SZA could find room for Travis Scott on a slow jam ballad, Open Arms, as well as Phoebe Bridgers (Ghost in the Machine)," - I guess "wins out" covers the information, but it seems to be a bit biased in my opinion in its current wording.
 * This was supplementary to ref 57, but I've restructured the sourcing in that paragraph, and separated this ref as citing how the song contributes to the album's diversity. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Not really? I don't see how "cohesive" is a biased word to use. - Elias
 * I was mostly remarking how " many praised the collaboration as successful" was biased, since I didn't think source 56 would call that praise. The Guardian said "Clocking in at 23 tracks, SOS might well register as a distress signal, with SZA searching for a through line connecting her album’s multiple producers, its grab bag of genres and disparate featured guests," "it treads a fine line between swashbuckling versatility and a lack of cohesion.", and "Better sequencing might have smoothed the bumps." The Guardian review very much read as mixed, not quite as successful. To include it with " many praised the collaboration as successful despite the two artists' different musical styles" feels contrary to the source, and makes me worried that the article might be biased in its point of view. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 21:22, 27 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I've attempted to resolve this by pulling the ref forward to §Background and using it a source for the song's contribution to the album's diversity. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 14:42, 4 July 2024 (UTC)
 * 60 - yea that covers it
 * 68 - that covers it
 * 76 - that works

Thanks, I replied, mostly still the same few concerns, regarding the beats per minute, the credits (mostly want to verify just for FAC purposes), and about the one source being contradictory to what's written in the article. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 21:22, 27 June 2024 (UTC)
 * So maybe it's only a few references I checked, but I'm not satisfied about the current state of referencing, and or bias. Would you mind checking these instances, and where possible, improve the referencing, or change the wording? ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 19:08, 25 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Hi, thank you for the review – I've worked through a few of these comments so far, and should be able to finish tomorrow. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 00:03, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Alrighty HH, I think I've got everything. Let me know if you have any more queries. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 19:28, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
 * @Hurricanehink and @Dylan620, I have provided my own responses above. PSA 🏕️🪐 (please make some noise...) 04:29, 27 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Apologies for taking so long to reply, but I think I've addressed your further comments. Please let me and PSA know if you have any more feedback. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 14:42, 4 July 2024 (UTC)

I'm happy to support now. I can see that there aren't a lot of good reliable links out there about the song's composition, which is a shame, but it's understandable. You've addressed my concerns satisfactorily. Best of luck finishing up this FAC! ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 20:50, 6 July 2024 (UTC)

Source review: Pass
To follow. - SchroCat (talk) 14:45, 19 July 2024 (UTC) Aside from the above, all the sources are properly formatted and from good enough quality sources. - SchroCat (talk) 19:31, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * Spot checks not done – can be done on request
 * The Credits section is entirely unsupported
 * This was addressed above in Hurricanehink's section, where PSA pointed out to me and Hurricanehink that for a song's credit listing is "generally assumed [to be present in the liner notes] and does not need explicit citation in most cases". I did provide a Discogs screencap of the liner notes to assist Hurricanehink in verifying the information. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:45, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * That's an essay. WP:VERIFIABILITY is a policy and I think it's probably best to include the citation - what's the harm in having it, given people are likely to pick up on the unsupported nature when this is on the main page. - SchroCat (talk) 20:53, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * Makes a lot more sense when you put it that way. I've restored the citation to the liner notes. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 21:08, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * (And why does it have its own Notes section, separate from the main one?)
 * I've merged this with the main notes section, but I'm pinging in case they have any objections.  Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:45, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * Some of your capitalisation is a little awry – short prepositions like "out" should be lower case
 * I think I've addressed this – I did capitalize a preposition (ref title 12 at time of writing) that directly followed an en dash. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:45, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * It may be best to archive those sources you've not done so far (this is a suggestion, not compulsory)
 * I've added an archived URL for the BBC Glastonbury source, but the others that don't already have archives are that way because those references are generated by templates. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:45, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * A search shows no missing sources from books or journals
 * Much appreciated, . I've replied inline. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:45, 20 July 2024 (UTC)


 * Pass of the source review. - SchroCat (talk) 06:55, 21 July 2024 (UTC)

Image review: Pass
To follow. UndercoverClassicist</b> T·C 18:38, 20 July 2024 (UTC)


 * I would advise making the alt texts more visually descriptive -- they are all for pictures of people, and yet tell us nothing about what those people look like. However, consensus is that the FA standards don't impose rigid criteria for alt text, as long as an attempt has been made.
 * File:Phoebe Bridgers at Surly Brewing Festival Field in Minneapolis, MN.jpg -- CC 2.0 licence, derivative of a file from Flickr given the OK by Wikimedia -- checks out.
 * File:SZA CTRL Tour Toronto 2017 8 (cropped).jpg: likewise, except not a derivative -- checks out.
 * File:RobBisel–NicKhang1 (2) (cropped) (cropped).jpg: derivative of a work released under CC 4.0, as confirmed by the author (and subject) -- checks out.
 * File:Sadhguru-Jaggi-Vasudev.jpg: confirmed as PD by Wikimedia -- checks out.

No lead image, but also no obvious candidates -- the song doesn't seem to have been yet released as a single, so the standard practice of using the sleeve art under FUR can't be used here. <b style="color:#7F007F">UndercoverClassicist</b> T·C 19:08, 20 July 2024 (UTC)
 * Much appreciated, . We're on a similar wavelength with our views of alt text. I'm currently working on preparing Timeline of the 2011 Pacific hurricane season for FLC, and have tried to make the track map and satellite photo alt texts as descriptive as possible. A picture is worth a thousand words, as the old saying goes. I'll try to think of something to spruce up the alt texts here. Dylan 620  (he/him • talk • edits) 20:50, 20 July 2024 (UTC)