Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Israeli citizenship law/archive1

Israeli citizenship law

 * Nominator(s): Horserice (talk) 01:48, 8 May 2022 (UTC)

This article is about the history and law of Israeli citizenship. This continues the series of nationality/citizenship law articles I have been steadily rewriting. This article obviously covers a sensitive topic so please point out any areas that may not be sufficiently neutral. Thanks, Horserice (talk) 01:48, 8 May 2022 (UTC)

image review
 * Suggest adding alt text
 * Added for both photographs.


 * File:Emblem_of_Israel.svg needs a US tag
 * Done.


 * File:British_Colonial_passport_for_Palestine_issued_by_Albert_Montefiore_Hyamson_in_1929.jpg: it would seem in this case that the first copyright holder would not have been the State of Israel but rather the UK? Nikkimaria (talk) 02:08, 8 May 2022 (UTC)
 * My guess is that since Israel is the successor state to Mandatory Palestine and Israel continued to use British copyright law until 2008 that the original uploader assumed that it was more appropriate to use the Israel template rather than the UK one. I've added the UK template but left the Israel one in for now.
 * Sorry for being unable to address comments more quickly. Horserice (talk) 07:43, 18 May 2022 (UTC)


 * Without progress towards promotion, the article is liable to be archived in the next few days. (t &#183; c)  buidhe  00:50, 27 May 2022 (UTC)

Comments Support from BigDom
Not a topic I knew much, if anything, about but I didn't want to see this archived without any comments on the prose so had a read through. I have to say it was very well-written and accessible to a non-expert, just a couple of very minor comments I came up with:
 * "the Supreme Court" -> I'm from the UK and we have our own Supreme Court but as soon as I read this my mind went straight to the US Supreme Court since it's often in the news, maybe worth using the full name on first mention?
 * Done.


 * "comprehensive jurisdiction" -> is this a law term? If so, what does it mean? A Google search for the phrase brings up a lot of hits in the context of China & Hong Kong
 * Eh, I was using it as an alternative way of saying that Britain held sovereignty so I replaced it with exactly that.


 * "on request by the Israeli government" -> "at the request of the Israeli government"
 * Done.


 * "involuntarily deprived from" sounds a bit strange to me and a Google search for this exact phrase only brings up a handful of Wikipedia pages (and mirror sites) written by yourself. Maybe "removed from" (or another synonym)?
 * I probably was phrasing it this way in some other article to more explicitly distinguish between voluntarily relinquishing citizenship versus having it involuntarily deprived. Used "removed from" instead. I guess it really is weird phrasing if I'm the only person on the internet writing that.


 * "replaced by less restrictive conditions of stay until they become eligible for citizenship over a period of 4.5 years" -> "replaced by less restrictive conditions of stay over a period of 4.5 years until they become eligible for citizenship" (seems more logical to me this way)
 * Done.


 * "Haredi/ultra-orthodox" - NPOV issue? The page Haredi Judaism says the term "ultra-orthodox" is often considered pejorative.
 * Oh whoops, that's not good to overlook. Removed this.

Sourcing looks good and media check has already been done. One thing I would say is that the lead feels a little short for an article of almost 3,000 words. Maybe something about dual nationality and revocation of citizenship could be included? Hope these comments are useful. Cheers, BigDom (talk) 10:54, 29 May 2022 (UTC)
 * Thanks for taking a look! I've also expanded the lead slightly and hope this addresses everything. Horserice (talk) 07:32, 30 May 2022 (UTC)
 * Looks good, happy to support. BigDom (talk) 11:34, 30 May 2022 (UTC)

Coordinator note
After nearly four weeks this nomination has only attracted one general support. Unless further attention is forthcoming over the next three or four days I am afraid that it is liable to be archived. Gog the Mild (talk) 19:57, 5 June 2022 (UTC)

Gog the Mild (talk) 20:48, 12 June 2022 (UTC)