Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Metroid Prime


 * The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted 00:58, 26 February 2008.

Metroid Prime
* Check external links
 * previous FAC (04:16, 23 October 2007)
 * previous FAC (14:00, 15 December 2007)
 * User:igordebraga Did tremendous work on this article, and it seems that every critique from the last FAC was addressed but it did not pass for some reason. It is comprehensive, well written and well sourced. Third times a charm! Judgesurreal777 (talk) 22:13, 20 February 2008 (UTC)


 * Co-nominate and Support. I would wait a little bit before re-re-nominating (asking someone to copyedit since that's what most people complained in the FACs, and the so-called experts are really slow), but I wasn't bold enough. Everything you comment in this FAC, I'll try to fix. And if this fails, (*knock, knock, knock*) I'll try again. igordebraga ≠ 22:28, 20 February 2008 (UTC)


 * A few things to be straightened up before I support. I've reviewed this article many times, and I feel that it's reached a featured point. However, a few problems need to be straightened out:


 * In the gameplay, we have: "and shooting foes, with the addition of a "lock-on" mechanism that allows circlestrafing while keeping focus on the enemy." I think it could be better rendered as "and shooting foes with the help of a 'lock-on' mechanism that allows circlestrafing while staying aimed on the enemy."
 * In the items section: "You can also use a "soft mod" device such as Action Replay or Gameshark to do this or other things." First-person is an absolute no-no.
 * In the plot section: "Prime has an extensive use of storyline." I think "use of" is best omitted; it seems rather redundant.
 * The image fair use rationales should mention the article the fair use rationale is for, so "Fair use rationale for Metroid Prime" would be the correct way to write the section title.
 * Would it be okay to find something about the speedrunning? Specialized communities are mentioned, but no source is given.

I'll be checking to see if improvements are made, although if I forget to check (which is quite possible), it would be good of you to reply to me.  bibliomaniac 1  5  00:00, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * All concerns addressed! Let us know if you notice or have others. Judgesurreal777 (talk) 02:01, 21 February 2008 (UTC)


 * Changed to Support. Good job, Igordebraga and Judgesurreal. The article really has improved over the ages.  bibliomaniac 1  5  02:47, 21 February 2008 (UTC)


 * Support Looks good. Epbr123 (talk) 10:22, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * Support Excellent work on the article. Comandante  Talk  00:42, 22 February 2008 (UTC)

Comments: A decent article, but there are errors, as well as disappointing prose. I hope that this helps. Ashnard Talk  Contribs  17:16, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * "becoming one of the highest reviewed games of all time." I know what's meant, but this is ambiguous and a bit awkward. This could mean a game that has received the most reviews. Please reword.
 * Please conform to WP: DASH. Spaced endashes or unspaced emdashes.
 * "which protects Samus' armor against heat, allowing to enter volcanic areas." Prose isn't great here
 * "Among these are the Morph Ball, which allows to roll into narrow passages and drop energy bombs" Do you mean "which allows Samus"?
 * "and allowing to swing from them across gaps." As before; without it, it sounds ungrammatical
 * "The percentage of collected items and Scan Visor logs unlock art galleries and different endings." The percentage itself does nothing&mdash;it's just a value. Rewrite to make clear that these unlockables are dependent on the percentage.
 * "Manipulation of the game's physics can allow knowledgeable players to receive items earlier than intended, or to bypass collecting them, a challenge known as sequence breaking." I'd omit this. Some guys (or girls) broke the system. So what?
 * "The player can also use a "soft mod" device such as Action Replay or Gameshark to do these things." Again, worthless and seems to infringe upon WP: GAMEGUIDE
 * Plot's too long for my liking, but this is just a stylistic preference of mine&mdash;there are some FAs with larger plots than this.
 * "because Nintendo "couldn't come out with any concrete ideas". Shouldn't you mention who said this?
 * "Director Mark Pacini said Retro tried to make the game in a way the only difficult parts would be boss battles," Shouldn't there be that after "the"?
 * Don't leave the last two sentences as standalone paragraphs as they're too short.
 * Possibly too much weight is given to the game's sequels.
 * The external link to Mobygames is questionable by looking at how bare the page is
 * You have to external links to the game's soundtracks, yet, to my knowledge, these soundtrack aren't even mentioned in the article.
 * Why have you linked speedrunning twice consecutively in the last sentence of "Reception"?
 * Refs are inconsistent&mdash;some are "forename","surname" while others aren't.
 * If you can find an alternative to ref 4, then use it.


 * Ok, all the corrections are done, and here are a few responses:
 * 1)Dashes suck! :) I think I got them all, this article was way over dashed before.
 * 2)The sequence breaking sentence is related the speedrunning, so I elaborated in that sentence.
 * 3)I looked over the plot, but there isn't a lot of unnecessary detail, like descriptions or things like that, so I left it as is.
 * 4)I trimmed out a sentence of the legacy section, talking about how Prime Hunters was multiplayer, not really relevant. I think it's pretty concise, but let me know if you see something that could go.
 * 5) I checked, and the soundtrack is mentioned in a sentence, though it doesn't go into detail.
 * 6)Speedrunning is linked twice, once as the general topic, and once to the section of the article dealing with Metroid, as this a major speedrunning game.

So let me know your thoughts, and if there are more corrections. :) Judgesurreal777 (talk) 19:59, 21 February 2008 (UTC)


 * Personally, I don't feel that the reference to speedrunning adds anything to the understanding of the game, but that's just me. As I've said, the plot's probably okay, I'd just personally prefer something more brief. Thanks for making so many amendments, though. As I've said before, I don't think that the prose is up to the job, but I'll have a go at rewording some parts if I have enough time tomorrow. Thanks. Ashnard  Talk  Contribs  22:42, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * I'll cut that sentence as speedrunning is already mentioned below, and look at the plot again. Once you do your rewording when you get the chance, let me know if you notice any more prose issues that we can tackle. :) Judgesurreal777 (talk) 23:02, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * I shaved a bit off the plot. Judgesurreal777 (talk) 23:12, 21 February 2008 (UTC)
 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.