Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Tales of Graces/archive1

Tales of Graces

 * The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by User:Laser brain 09:53, 30 July 2013.


 * Nominator(s): DragonZero  ( Talk  ·  Contribs ) 22:09, 19 July 2013 (UTC)

This article includes every information in existence, I think. I want to see how it'll fare in FAC before my summer ends. DragonZero ( Talk  ·  Contribs ) 22:09, 19 July 2013 (UTC)
 * Withdrawn. DragonZero  ( Talk  ·  Contribs ) 20:11, 25 July 2013 (UTC)


 * Support - on the disclaimer that I was the GA reviewer for this article and had any concerns I had addressed after the review. My full GA review can be found here.   Red Phoenix  build the future...remember the past... 22:12, 20 July 2013 (UTC)

Oppose
 * Prose needs extensive copy-editing. I'm seeing shifts in tenses ("found an amnesiac girl and witnesses her death"), redundancy ("received positive reception"), and awkward phrasing ("citing the gameplay to be") in the lead alone
 * Plot section is very confusing to someone unfamiliar with the game. For example, how is Sophie alive seven years later? Did she die first or not?
 * It wasn't explained until late in the game and I used her character's page for it since I couldn't get it to flow with the story.


 * Further attention to the Manual of Style is needed. Game titles should always be italicized, don't link the same terms twice in a single section, etc
 * Yeah, I was wondering whether each of those characters counted as a section or not. I forgot to italicize the game titles there.


 * Lots of primary sources - in addition to the primary-sources section, you've also got things like Silverstein's resume and Facebook posts
 * Primary sources were mostly for plot related things. I thought the resume site would be preferable over Behind the Voice Actors but guess not. I thought the facebook post might pass since it's a post by the company and that the company's website hasn't updated itself to include the game.

At this point, I would probably suggest withdrawal so you can revamp the sourcing and then send the article through the Guild. Nikkimaria (talk) 13:47, 25 July 2013 (UTC)
 * Some citations don't support the material they're meant to. For example, you cite "The text was translated by 8-4" to this site, which makes clear that their list includes titles where "[their involvement was] super minor (i.e. “translated one character’s 17 battle lines and took the game director out to dinner”)" without differentiation from titles where they were more extensively involved - with that source alone, you can only say 8-4 was involved, not that the text was translated by them.
 * Yeah I'll withdrawal. DragonZero  ( Talk  ·  Contribs ) 20:09, 25 July 2013 (UTC)

-- Laser brain  (talk)  13:51, 30 July 2013 (UTC)
 * The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.