Wikipedia:Peer review/Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magick Obscura/archive1

Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magick Obscura
My main concerns at the moment:


 * Should the Races+Locations info be removed to separate article(s) or not?
 * Are there major structural changes/reorderings you think would improve it?
 * Are there enough pictures, or can you think of a better arrangement of the existing pictures?
 * Are the references sufficient (or even correctly done)?

I know the Development section is dead skinny. There's barely any data on the game in that respect. I can't find any remotely clear account of the bugs it released with.

Anything else you could offer would be excellent, thanks. Hide&amp;Reason 02:44, 1 October 2006 (UTC)


 * Just very briefly:
 * The article is already very long, and a lot of the material suffers from WP:WAF problems, in particular sections 4 to 8, in that it describes the gameworld from an in-universe perspective, which is to be avoided. Also, the sheer length and detail of the gameworld descriptions threatens to violate the policy that WP:NOT a game guide. For these reasons, I'd favor cutting down on gameworld descriptions radically, instead of spinning them off to other articles. Section 8 ("Half-ogre Island conspiracy") in particular is one egregious WP:NOT problem. I've added cleanup tags to that effect.
 * Trivia sections tend to be frowned upon (see WP:TRIVIA).
 * We should try to use only as much non-free (ie fair use) images as is absolutely necessary, so I'd not add any more screenshots, concept art etc.
 * Best regards, Sandstein 21:56, 2 October 2006 (UTC)


 * Okay, sections 6 and 7 have been taken care of for now. But I don't see how section 4 is in-universe.  I mean, this is the core of the entire game; it's the nucleus of whatever will eventually satisfy the 'compelling prose' clause of WP:FAC.


 * As for section 5, I suppose I could write a more generalised summary of the mechanics, and CP the existing stuff to another 'adjunct' article.


 * As for images, I don't yet think we have enough, actually. I don't just want screenshots, but at the moment the article could use perhaps two or three more. Hide&amp;Reason 03:49, 3 October 2006 (UTC)


 * The lead needs expansion, so it may better summarize the topic. See computer and video game featured articles for ideas on how this may be done. Gameplay is necessary, so the entire section shouldn't be moved to a gaming wiki. Try moving the "Steamworks" and "Magickal obscura" sections, and make brief mention of them in the rest of the gameplay section. "Half-ogre Island conspiracy" should be moved or cut, your call. General practice with computer and video game article layout involves placement of the gameplay and story sections first, and then following with the more real-world details. That's all for now. I may give it another look later. JimmyBlackwing 05:57, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Alright:


 * Races/Locations/Conspiracy removed
 * Lead expanded to three paras
 * More references
 * Gamplay section rewritten (I'm fairly sure) as out-of-universe
 * Development section marginally expanded + transferred after the game stuff

So is it just a case of it needing a few more refs and pics, and section expansions now? Hide&amp;Reason 04:39, 7 October 2006 (UTC)
 * Something along those lines. I think the lead spends a little too much time talking about critical reaction and sales, when it should also give a brief, spoiler-free idea of what the game is about. The article was a mess before, but things are a little better now. It still needs huge amounts of work before it's even GA-class, though. It's an interesting subject, so it would be great to see this article improve to GA or FA status. Good job on your work so far. JimmyBlackwing 11:19, 8 October 2006 (UTC)


 * Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, Ruhrfisch 15:39, 17 October 2006 (UTC)