Wikipedia:Peer review/Bad Blood (2004)/archive1

===Bad Blood (2004)===


 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for September 2008.
 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for September 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because… I want to know what needs to be done, so the article can become an FA.

Thanks, --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 19:52, 25 September 2008 (UTC) :Note: Because of its length, this peer review is not transcluded. It is still open and located at Peer review/Bad Blood (2004)/archive1.

SRX's comments

 * Comments on match #4

-- S R X  02:03, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * The start of the match saw Victoria and Lita double team Stratus, but Stratus rolled out of the ring. - what does double team mean? where did she roll out to?
 * Both Victoria and Lita "attacked" Trish, that's what it means and the other part means she got out of the ring. --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 21:21, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * When I asked that, I meant in a way so you could add it to the article.-- S R X  23:41, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Its probably the day, but I have no idea what you're trying to say. So, how bout if I throw in this sentence ---> "A two-on-one assault by Victoria and Lita saw them double team on Stratus...." --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 18:14, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Lita and Victoria went on to double team Kim, however, Stratus pulled Lita out of the ring, which left Victoria to perform a move in which Victoria stood next to Kim lying on the ground and executed a backflip and landed on her. - you could say double team earlier and explain it and you can use it here. Also, would be better as ''afterward or afterwards, Victoria performed a backflip and landed on Kim's torso.
 * Wouldn't double team be explained for itself? --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 21:21, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * See my comment above.-- S R X  23:41, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Mine as well. --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 18:14, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Lita went for the pin, however, Stratus rolled Lita up for the pinfall victory, thus Stratus' becoming Women's champion for a fifth time. - I'm not sure if you explained "rolled" earlier or not, if not you need to.
 * Well, at JD'05 there's mention of "roll-up" works. If I have to explain it in the article, how would I do it? --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 21:21, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Well you could say, Stratus grabbed Lita's legs and positioned her on her shoulders to gain a pinfall.-- S R X  23:41, 8 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Done. --  ThinkBlue  (Hit BLUE) 18:14, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

Wrestlinglover's comments
Okay I'm sorry, I forgot about this. I got busy again. Okay here are my comments for the lead.


 * Lead
 * "Bad Blood grossed over $494,000 ticket sales from an attendance of 9,000 and received 264,000 pay-per-view buys" - maybe you should put "in" between "000" and "ticket".-- Will C  05:37, 30 September 2008 (UTC)
 * You have Billboard linked wrong.-- Will C  05:37, 30 September 2008 (UTC)

I found time to do a little of the background.-- Will C  06:39, 2 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Background
 * I'm sorry but I did not find any problems in the background. I do think Rob Coway doesn't need his name in parenthesis because Robert is fine but other than that it is good. I'll read the event section tomorrow. I haven't had time alot lately so I'm sorry.-- Will C  06:39, 2 October 2008 (UTC)


 * Event
 * I was told by an FA reviewer that the first sentence in the Event section should have the title of the ppv in it. Like "Before the 2004 edition of Bad Blood went live" or "Before Bad Blood went live".-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "La Résistance gained the early advantage when Conway grabbed Edge and rammed him onto the security wall, back first." --Maybe you should say that they are fighting on the outside of the ring.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "The second match was Tyson Tomko (Travis Tomko) accompanied with Trish Stratus [Patricia Stratigias])" --Change "with" to "by".-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * I do not think singles match is need afterwards.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "Jericho attempted to springboard of the middle rope to perform a backflip," to "Jericho attempted to springboard off of the middle rope to perform a backflip,"-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "and hooked Benjamin's tights to pin Benjamin for the three count and retaining the Intercontinental Championship." I do not think "retaining" is needed. Instead just "retain".-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "The fifth match was between Eugene and Jonathan Coachman in a standard match." --I do not believe Standard match is needed.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "which prompted Cade to tore up toy animal." --Sounds awkward. Maybe you can fix it.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "and coming off to attempt and hit Benoit with his forearm by jumping off the top rope" to "and coming off to attempt and hit Benoit with his forearm when he jumped off" --The other way is redundant in my mind.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "but Kane fought out of and Benoit rolled Kane up in a pin to get a three count, and thus retaining the World Heavyweight Championship." to "Kane fought out of it, Benoit them rolled Kane up in a pin to get a three count, and thus retaining the World Heavyweight Championship." --A run on the other way.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * "This was followed with Michaels' slamming Triple H's head onto the steel cage, resulting in Triple H being scripted to bleed from the forehead, the blood loss results from previous cuts that wrestlers perform before a match called blading." --Are we should he was scripted to bleed? I'm just throwing that out there because it might come up in the FA review.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Aftermath
 * Explain what SummerSlam is. "At SummerSlam," Say WWE's August pay-per-view event.
 * You never explain that Triple H won number one contendership to fight Benoit at Vengeance. You say Triple H vs. Eugene ended in a No Contest but then later say Benoit defeats Kane and earns the right to fight Triple H at Vengeance, or something like that. You do not mention how he got to fight Benoit.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * Reception
 * Why do you not have the rating for the Hell in the Cell? I would have the rating for Kane vs Benoit, HBK vs Triple H, and Orton vs. Benjamin since they are the main matches. The lowest match can stay if you wish but I do not know what it brings to the article.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * In Sacrifice's GA review, the editor said he wanted The Sun's opinion in it because of commentary. I thought it was a good idea and it adds to the Reception. Maybe you could look on The Sun's website and see if they have a review. Look at Sacrifice (2008)'s GA review to understand what I mean.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)


 * I'm sorry it took me so long but I haven't been in the mood to read since that is all I do anymore. Now I feel there was something else I'm supposed to review and leave comments for but I have forgotten. If there is one, tell me on my talkpage. I always like to see I have a message when I get on everyday. Plus if I missed something, I'm sorry. I was listening to Metallica the entire time I read this. So I'm a little dizzy.-- Will C  06:23, 9 October 2008 (UTC)