Wikipedia:Peer review/Bart King/archive1

Bart King
Bart King was the greatest American cricketer ever. This article has been Peer Reviewed and listed as a Good Article. It just received a thorough copy edit. I'd like to solicit comments on one more peer review before listing at as an FAC. Any help is greatly appreciated.-- Eva  b  d  18:42, 11 April 2007 (UTC)
 * First Peer Review
 * I would switch the placement of the pics, the infobox pic is supposed to show what the person looks like. You can barely see his face, the action pic should be down somewhere in the text. It would go nicely in a section describing his playing style or accomplishments. Quadzilla99 02:20, 13 April 2007 (UTC)
 * Thanks, Quadzilla. This has been changed. I've put a head shot in the infobox.-- Eva  b  d  19:24, 20 April 2007 (UTC)
 * Might go great in angling section. Quadzilla99 03:29, 13 April 2007 (UTC)
 * Good point. The batting pictures show his face a little bit better, but I'll try and find a decent head shot of the guy. Thanks for the tip.-- Eva  b  d  12:34, 14 April 2007 (UTC)
 * I've sent off an e-mail to the CC Morris Cricket Library to see if they have any more images of King--especially a head shot. There is one on Cricinfo, but I'd rather not try and justify a fair use image for the infobox. I'll keep ya'll posted.-- Eva  b  d  12:55, 14 April 2007 (UTC)


 * Having a single subsection (3.1 The "angler") is bad style. Promote the section, or merge with parent.
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  13:45, 14 April 2007 (UTC)


 * =Teams= subsections not needed. Too small
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  13:48, 14 April 2007 (UTC)


 * at least one first-class bowling record name the record
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  19:27, 16 April 2007 (UTC)


 * He competed with and succeeded against the best cricketers in the world from England and Australia -- choppy -- there are many such examples in the text where the sentences do not flow.
 * Done. If you can point to any other sections that are choppy, I'll gladly address those, as well.-- Eva  b  d  00:29, 17 April 2007 (UTC)


 * likeable --> affable
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  19:27, 16 April 2007 (UTC)


 * Belmont Cricket Club image should be right-aligned
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  13:45, 14 April 2007 (UTC)


 * and rolled very fast --> odd phrasing for a even person familiar with cricketing terms
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  00:29, 17 April 2007 (UTC)


 * If possible a table of Kings scores vs each team would be a value addition.
 * Started at WP:CRIC. Should be finished soon.-- Eva  b  d  18:23, 17 April 2007 (UTC)


 * A chart of his scores over a period of time would be useful too.
 * Requested from Raven4x4x. Should be done soon.-- Eva  b  d  18:23, 17 April 2007 (UTC)


 * were nothing remarkable --> use postive tone
 * Done.-- Eva  b  d  19:27, 16 April 2007 (UTC)

=Nichalp  «Talk»=  12:35, 14 April 2007 (UTC)


 * Thanks for the suggestions Nichalp! I've addressed the ones that I can, mostly involving formatting and minor bits. The tables and charts are beyond me. I'll see if someone at WP:CRIC can help.-- Eva  b  d  00:31, 17 April 2007 (UTC)
 * A table has now been started, and I've asked Raven4x4x for help in making a chart of the scores. That should take care of all of Nichalp's concerns, unless you can provide more instances of choppiness in the prose. Thanks!-- Eva  b  d  13:37, 17 April 2007 (UTC)

It would look more professional if you could stub the red links. PS the graphs and stats need to be added. Regards, =Nichalp   «Talk»=  17:02, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

=Nichalp  «Talk»=  04:26, 21 April 2007 (UTC)
 * Further comments
 * The statistics information should come after =Achievements and legacy= See Adam Gilchrist
 * King toured England with the Philadelphians a third time in 1908. The first match that was played was against South Wales in Cardiff. The Philadelphians won by 36 behind the bowling of King and Ranji Hordern. The pair took all 20 wickets of the Welsh side.[17] The first-class matches began with Worcestershire on July 9. -- choppy + the a flow needed when starting a new section
 * King is also noted for holding the bowling record against Canada --> first sentence should be an introductory one
 * =Teams= convert to a table and add in =Cricketing career=


 * Thanks again, Nichalp. I've tackled all your suggestions save the last. I am useless at making tables, so if you could create the said table for the team info, that would be great. Otherwise, any other critiques you can offer are most welcome. Thanks.-- Eva  b  d  23:09, 22 April 2007 (UTC)