Wikipedia:Peer review/Battle of Ginnis/archive1

Battle of Ginnis
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review. I created this a while back, and it is far from the best article I have written. I would like to improve it - I made some minor restructuring edits about a month ago - and am interested in comments from other editors on the article's quality.

Thanks,  DCI talk 20:03, 9 October 2011 (UTC)


 * Hello, DCI. Interesting article. Sorry, I don't have any content knowledge, but I have some general suggestions (aimed towards raising the article to B class standard). Feel free to ignore or implement as you see fit:
 * the lead probably needs to be expanded to at least a full paragraph (currently it is only one sentence);
 * English variation: the article appears to use some US English spelling, when it should possibly use British English given that the topic relates to Britain (e.g "color" --> "colour", "defenses" --> "defences");
 * the addition of an infobox and/or some images (this would cover off on the B5 criterion);
 * referencing: at least one citation per paragraph for B class, but the more the better. If possible, my suggestion is to mix paper sources (books) with online sources;
 * watch out for overlink - "brigade" is linked a number of times in the one paragraph (there may be others);
 * is there any information on casualties that could be added to the article? AustralianRupert (talk) 10:48, 20 October 2011 (UTC)

Comments
 * Agree the lead needs expanding
 * The date format is not standard British style 30 December - its not a problem for me but it may be brought up at any higher review
 * Anglo-Egyptian Army - Anglo is not commonly known outside of ex British Empire country's suggest change to the British and Egyptian army
 * Dervish can be linked
 * Dervish State instead of Dervish Empire
 * The abbreviation Berkshire has been used while the other infantry regiment have the correct titles Durham Light Infantry for example. You should be consistent with what method you use
 * First Brigade and Second Brigade should be 1st and 2nd Brigade especially as you use 2nd Brigade later on. Or as was common for the time use the commanders name - Butlers Brigade - what ever you choose be consistent
 * White sun helmet can be linked to pith helmet
 * Screw gun can be linked to RML 2.5 inch Mountain Gun
 * More in line citations are required
 * The bare url reference should be formatted use the cite web format
 * If Queen Victoria's Little Wars by Byron Farwell is a book you should use the cite book format

Well done a good start, if you need any help or have any questions just drop me a note here or on my talk. Jim Sweeney (talk) 17:51, 20 October 2011 (UTC)


 * Hello. I am sorry it's taken me so long to respond, but I've been caught up in another review.  I will be able to work on this more in the coming week.  Thank you for your comments.   DCI talk 17:36, 23 October 2011 (UTC)