Wikipedia:Peer review/Burger King advertising/archive2

Burger King advertising
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I am looking to bring it to GA status and complete the set of articles to bring the subject to good topic status. A fresh pair of eyes would help substantially.
 * Previous peer review

Thanks, Jeremy (blah blah • I did it!) 06:41, 12 December 2011 (UTC)

The Rambling Man (talk) 15:56, 18 December 2011 (UTC)
 * Comments - a vast article so I'll probably give comments from a top level and re-review if requested.
 * If you insist on referring to the company as BK, at least put (BK) after the first time you mention Burger King.
 * Infobox has spaced hyphens, it should use spaced en-dashes (per WP:DASH).
 * This is the case throughout the article as well, I'll try to pick up some of the as I go.
 * infobox, Fast Food is not a proper noun, Fast food is fine.
 * "ad agencies" -> "advertising agencies"
 * " flop Where's Herb?." avoid double period.
 * "1970s/1980s " 1970s and 80s.
 * "Where is your God now?." avoid double period.
 * "the 18-35 demographic" needs an en-dash.
 * From the TOC, what's going on with the section headings? Looks like something needs to be fixed here.
 * Also not sure why you're only allowing level 1 headings, at least allow level 2.
 * You link Star Wars twice to different articles, perhaps consider the second link being Star Wars series or something.
 * "The relationship with George Lucas' Lucasfilm, LTD." don't think you need George Lucas' here...
 * "in which Gellar stated that" in which she stated..
 * "of a whopper" shouldn't whopper be capitalised here?
 * There is also an article on it.
 * Images, like the Van Eede one, should be either just  for landscape or   for portrait images.  Don't force images any bigger/smaller in the main article.
 * General Market -> General market.
 * "1958–68 - Hume" should be an en-dash before Hume (see others).
 * "2001–2002" should be "2001–02" to be consistent.
 * Heading - Modern Campaigns -> Modern campaigns (per WP:HEAD).
 * "One of it major" its.
 * Rewrite "Other media" section so it's prose rather than bullet points.
 * "May 1, 1969-April 30, 1994" spaced en-dash needed here.
 * circular is a dab link.
 * You use HJ without explanation.
 * Is it worth a minor note explaining why Hungry Jacks is used instead of Burger King in certain locations?
 * Is the Children's logo section a different format to the others? The text is smaller.  Be consistent.
 * What does QSR mean?
 * Second para of Non-product oriented advertising is unreferenced.
 * Children's advertising section is woefully lacking in references.
 * A lot of detail on the individual members of the Kid's Club characters, probably a little over the top.
 * Media Tie-ins -> tie-ins.
 * "McDonald's\Ty Beanie Babies" odd angled slash, surely /?
 * Don't mix date formats in the references.
 * Ensure online references are comprehensive, i.e. have publisher info, access dates, etc. (e.g. look at ref 69, it has nothing)
 * Publications like Time should be in italics.
 * Many external links appear unnecessary for this specific article.


 * I thank you greatly for the review, Ill hopefull get back to this after I return from the Christmas break. --Jeremy (blah blah • I did it!) 17:24, 19 December 2011 (UTC)
 * No problem at all. Have a good Christmas.  Feel free to ping me in the future when you get back to the article.  The Rambling Man (talk) 17:48, 19 December 2011 (UTC)