Wikipedia:Peer review/Canada Day/archive1

Canada Day
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because there was WikiProject Canada interest in bringing the article on Canada's national holiday up to FA standard (see Wikipedia talk:Canadian Wikipedians' notice board). Whether the Canada Day 2008 deadline is met, it would be useful to move what we have towards GA/FA.
 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for May 2008.
 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for May 2008.

Thanks, Dl2000 (talk) 18:25, 31 May 2008 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: I think this is close to GA already and needs some work to get to FA. I enjoyed reading it and will make my suggestions for improvement with an eye towards FA: Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch &gt;&lt;&gt; &deg; &deg; 01:36, 6 June 2008 (UTC)
 * The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article. My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way, so the sections on International celebrations, Exception, and Other Canadian observances on the same date should be in the lead somehow. Please see WP:LEAD
 * Images should be set to thumb to allow reader preferences to take over, and the text should not be sandwiched between images. See WP:MOS
 * The caption Canada Day [?] on Wellington Street, in front of the Château Laurier, in Ottawa seems to be missing a word - celebration? parade? festivities?
 * Biggest problem as I see it for GA (and FA) is references - My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref. As it is whole paragraphs and sections have no refs.
 * Internet refs need URL, title, author if known, publisher and date accessed. cite web and other cite templates may be helpful. See WP:CITE and WP:V
 * Another concern for FA will be length - while length is not an official FA criterion, comprehensiveness is and short articles are often lacking coverage. I am not sure what is lacking, but it seems the history could be expanded and the current coverage and photos are fairly Quebec-centered. What do people do in Vancouver or PEI?
 * Several paragraphs are only one or two sentences and need to be expanded or combined with others.
 * I think See also is for links that do not appear in the article itself, so Dominion Day and Moving Day probably should not be there.
 * Article could use a copyedit - I read for comprehension, not proofreading, but still noticed some typos and places that need polished.
 * I see the semi-automated peer review has not been run or has been removed. I will run it next as it usually has some useful suggestions, mostly on MOS issues.

Comments from
 * You said you wanted to know what to work on before taking to FAC, so I looked at the sourcing and referencing with that in mind. I reviewed the article's sources as I would at FAC. 16:51, 15 June 2008 (UTC)
 * What makes http://www.rsscanadaimmigration.com/en/citizenship/citizenshipoath.php a reliable source? Wouldn't it be better to source this to a government site?
 * http://www.dfait-maeci.gc.ca/canada-europa/united_kingdom/pdf/canadadaypressrelease.pdf is lacking a publisher
 * Current ref 20 (http://www.heritage.nf.ca/society/custom.html) is lacking a last access date.
 * I noticed some paragraphs and sections that are unreferenced, including statements like "As the day falls in July, Canada Day activities are frequently outdoors." or "Canada's centennial in 1967 is often seen as an important day in the history of Canadian patriotism, and in Canada's maturity as a distinct, independent country, after which Dominion Day became more popular with average Canadians." which could use citations.
 * Hope this helps.