Wikipedia:Peer review/Concord, New Hampshire/archive1

Concord, New Hampshire
I am from this city and have made contributions to the article. I would like to see this article reach GA status and maybe even FA status some day. Any comments would be helpful. Cooljeanius 20:47, 14 May 2007 (UTC)

Jayron32's review
Cool, a fellow Granite Stater! I grew up in Hudson myself. Well, here's some pointers to clean up this article for GA or FA status: I hope that gives you some places to work up the article. Good luck!--Jayron32| talk | contribs 04:21, 15 May 2007 (UTC)
 * 1) The lead is too short. The lead section needs to fully summarize the article.  Consider about 1 paragraph per section to do so.  See WP:LEAD for more help.
 * 2) The article is insufficiently referenced. The History section, for example, has no references.  I assume that the person who wrote this was reading from some source.  If they were, it should be referenced directly to the source, at minimum usually once inline reference (either footnote or parenthetical note) per paragraph (when only one source is used for the paragraph) or after each distinct fact (if a single paragraph is built from multiple sources).  If it is a print source, than relative page numbers should be included.  If it is a web source, a link to the specific page (not just the home page of the website) should be included.  See WP:CITE, WP:CITET, WP:RS, and WP:V for more information on when, how, why, and what to reference.  The article Cricket World Cup uses a referencing style that I find fairly easy to follow and work with.  It is a fairly short featured article I usually use as model when recommending a good referencing style.
 * 3) The Notable Inhabitants section is listy, and as such should probably be dropped to the end, and/or expanded so that each inhabitant is given a paragraph worth of treatment in full prose rather than list form.
 * 4) The media section should be expanded and more properly referenced. Some mention should also be given to TV, Radio and Newspapers which are distributed in Concord, even if not produced there (I am pretty sure the Union Leader is heavily distributed there as well)...
 * 5) Sites of interest section is listy again. Convert to prose.  Also, external links should NOT be part of the main text.  See WP:EL for more information.  Also, this is entirely unreferenced as well.
 * 6) Education section has external links as well. Consider expanding this section from a list only(the list here is permissiable, since the information it contains works well for a list) to a more full treatment of the Concord Educational System.  Most New Hampshire school districts maintain a district website.  Consider looking there for info, as well as the local paper.
 * 7) Overall, the article MAY be in need of a copyedit. I am a lousy copyeditor, as my spelling and grammar are usually not that great.  See out help at the League of Copyeditors once the article is up to snuff in other areas.


 * Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, APR t 23:58, 17 May 2007 (UTC)