Wikipedia:Peer review/Corpus Christi Bay/archive1

Corpus Christi Bay
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because it was recently promoted to GA status, and I want to get it ready for FA from here.

Thanks, Us441 (talk) 13:53, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

Finetooth comments: This is an interesting start and a good companion to Nueces Bay. It will need quite a bit of work, however, to reach FA. Here are suggestions for further improvement:


 * The imperial units should all be converted to metric as well per WP:MOSNUM. I like to use the convert template for these, and I converted the first two in the lead using this template.


 * The dabfinder tool above sees two links that go to disambiguation pages rather than their intended targets.

Lead
 * "and is a hotbed for tourism" - "Hotbed" is a bit slangy. Would "and attracts many tourists" be better?

History
 * "thought to have been inhabited by the Karankawa Indians before the European discovery" - Maybe "before the arrival of Europeans"?
 * "9,388 people were reported in the city during the 2000 census." - Numbers that begin sentences should be spelled out. If that seems awkward, it's possible to re-cast so that the number appears elsewhere in the sentence.
 * "was halted by Confederates on the same point in 1862," - Dates like 1862 are not normally linked.
 * "In addition to Corpus Christi, Kinney also found Nuecestown (known to settlers as The Motts) in 1852," - Why did they call it "The Motts"?

Features
 * "On average, the system is 3 metres (9.8 ft) deep... " - The imperial units usually come first in U.S.-centric articles.
 * "Every second, approximately 34 cubic metres (9,000 USgal) of water flows into the bay." - It must also flow out. Do the numbers above refer to the fresh water flowing into the bay? Is the bay tidal; that is, is there a reverse flow into the bay from the gulf at any time(s) of the day?
 * "Following the shoreline beginning at Naval Air Station Corpus Christi on the bay's southeastern peninsula, the features of the bay can be best described." - This is a bit awkward because it includes a judgment. Rather than claiming that this is the best way to describe the shoreline, it would be better just to describe it. The first sentence of a description could say, "The naval air station is on the peninsula at the southeastern end of the bay." The next sentences might say, "North of the air station is the X and Y, just across the mouth of the bay from B. About 2 mi west of B are something something."
 * Are all of the claims in the description of the shoreline actually supported by the two cited sources? Does either show the seawalls, for example? None of the description should depend on original research, which may be highly accurate but unverifiable. Sentences such as "Out in the bay, the Alta Vista Reef can be spotted from this location" seem to contain personal observations.


 * "In 2009, $1 million of federal stimulus money was delegated to the restoration of the marshland" - "Was designated for" or "was awarded for" rather than "was delegated to"?


 * "collaborated to place soil and plant marsh near the causeway" - A bit awkward because a reader may stumble over "soil and plant marsh". Maybe "collaborated to establish marshes near the causeway"?

Images References
 * File:AerialCorpusChristi.jpg is licensed as a public domain "own photo", but the file size is unusually small for a recent "own photo" and no camera details appear on the license page. The uploader's talk page indicates frequent difficulties with copyright matters. If I were the main contributor to this article, I would try to make sure this image was free of copyright restrictions. Once I was sure, I would upload it to the Commons to make it easily available to projects outside of the English Wikipedia. Alternatively, I would try to replace it with an image with no doubts about the license.
 * File:Falcon.JPG may have a different kind of problem. Images of three-dimensional art like this statue usually cannot be published in the U.S. without violating the rights of the artist who created the statue (or whoever owns the statue copyright). WP:FOP has details.
 * What makes trails.com a reliable source? If you want to link directly to United States Geological Survey topographic map quadrants, TopoQuest (and I believe others as well) publish them online. It's possible to include an url that takes a reader directly to the relevant quadrant. A further problem with trails.com is that it charges a fee for all but sample maps, whereas the TopoQuest maps are free and meet the guidelines of WP:RS.


 * The date formatting in the citations should be consistent.

Possibilities for expansion
 * Geology. What formed the bay and when? What kinds of rocks underlie the area?
 * Climate. Rain? Temperatures in Corpus Christi? Temperature(s) of the water?
 * Pollution. What's in the water besides water?
 * Jurisdiction. Who controls the bay?
 * Recreation. Who plays in the bay and how?
 * Transportation. Who uses the bay to get from one place to another? How do they get there?

I hope these suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article, especially one from the PR backlog at WP:PR; that is where I found this one. I don't usually watch the PR archives or check corrections or changes. If my comments are unclear, please ping me on my talk page. Finetooth (talk) 19:31, 14 August 2010 (UTC)

I am working on that. Us441(talk) (contribs) 18:44, 28 August 2010 (UTC)