Wikipedia:Peer review/Forensic entomologist/archive1

Forensic entomologist
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because we'd like some feedback about our work.

Thanks, ABrundage, Texas A&amp;M University (talk) 02:14, 2 April 2008 (UTC)


 * Tone of the article needs to be more encyclopaedic. It currently sounds like a career counselling page. It should have more Reliable sources. Shyamal (talk) 02:33, 4 April 2008 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: A lot of work has been done here, but much more needs to be done to clean this up to meet Wikipedia's Manual of Style. Here are some suggestions: Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch &gt;&lt;&gt; &deg; &deg; 12:14, 6 April 2008 (UTC)
 * I agree completely with Shyamal's comments.
 * Read about reliable sources - they need to be published, so interviews and lectures do not count
 * Expand the lead per WP:LEAD to summarize the whole article. For an article this long the lead should be 2-3 paragraphs long
 * Avoid lists (Tools section), convert to prose instead.
 * Article needs many more citations - every quote, every attribution, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and any thing likely to be challenged needs cited. In general every paragraph needs at least one ref
 * Avoid needless repetition - Dr. Jeffrey Tomberlin is described at least twice. Also is he an an Assistant Professor or a Professor (called both - there is a big difference).
 * Get rid of the conclusion section, it is not encyclopedic.
 * The tone needs to be encylcopedic - this is not a term paper, and people found in the hallways that you could ask about this profession are no substitute for library work and relaible published sources.