Wikipedia:Peer review/IPhone OS/archive1

IPhone OS
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because WP:IPHONEOS is looking to promote the article to a GA and needs some input for improvements.

Thanks, m o ɳ o  01:18, 2 May 2010 (UTC)


 * There are a lot of issues, mostly about being generally unorganized and haphazard. I've rewritten the history section; use it as a model. See how it flows? The jailbreaking section is proseline, and seems like it was conglomerated without order. Be consistent with your use (or disuse) of "the" before "iPhone OS"; I favor omitting it. And making all the references uniform and footnoted properly helps. HereToHelp (talk to me) 21:43, 7 May 2010 (UTC)

Finetooth comments:
 * The link-checker tool finds one dead url in the citations.
 * The major clean-up banner and all of the citation-needed tags will need to be addressed. Nothing that fails to meet WP:V should advance to GA.
 * The references, as HereToHelp notes above, should be made complete and consistent. For Internet sources this means including author, title, publisher, date of publication, url, and access date, if all of those are known or can be found. See HereToHelp's examples in the History section of how to use the cite family of templates. "Cite web" and "cite news" are slightly different, and there are other members of the "cite family" for other kinds of publications.
 * Terms like iPhone that are embedded in the main text normally do not also appear in the "See also" section, which is usually therefore quite short.
 * The alt-text tool in the toolbox at the top of this review page shows that the images lack alt text, meant for readers who can't see the images. WP:ALT has details. You may not need alt text for GA, but it's a good idea to add it anyway.

Hope this helps. Finetooth (talk) 02:26, 11 May 2010 (UTC)