Wikipedia:Peer review/Jenna Ortega/archive1

Jenna Ortega


Hi, all. I'd like to get this article to FA-status in the future; any comments on how it could be improved would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks, Pamzeis (talk) 08:59, 6 June 2024 (UTC)

LunaEclipse
Going to review this article's references in a bit. I currently have a peer review open for DJ Kool Herc, it would be nice if you checked it out.

OK, here are my comments: 🌙E cl i ps e (talk) (contribs) 14:10, 6 June 2024 (UTC)
 * I would recommend removing the Ty Burr citation, as self-published sources, even if authored by experts, are prohibited in biographies of living persons.
 * I'm unsure of Collider's credibility, as it is a Valnet property, and such websites are known to be content farms/mills.
 * Speaking of Valnet, there's a handful of Comic Book Resources citations here. These articles were all published after 2016 and are unreliable.
 * Hiya, ! Thanks for your comments—I've removed Ty Burr's blog and any Valnet-owned sources. I'll try and review DJ Kool Herc by the end of next week. Again, thanks. Pamzeis (talk) 14:12, 8 June 2024 (UTC)

Joeyquism
Hello Pamzeis! This will be my first contribution to a PR; delighted to be reviewing your article! Some things I'm noticing below: Hi, ! A belated welcome to PR! Hope you decide to stick around. Apologies for not responding earlier; I have not been the most active on wiki lately. I will try to resolve your comment on the lead (though writing leads are definitely not my strong point), but I may rework some sections of the article before I do so. Thanks for the comments :) Pamzeis (talk) 10:09, 23 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Her mother attempted to distract her with activities... — The meaning is obvious, but would benefit from adding the word "other" before "activities"; there's a subtle implication that acting does not fall under "activities" with this wording.
 * ...adding that her family "keep [her] feet on the ground". — Should be "keep[s]", if I'm not mistaken; in American English the word "family" is treated as a single unit. A bit of a pedantic point, but the article is tagged American English, and my American brain clocked it as a bit strange.
 * Otherwise, it's very well-written as it stands. Well done!
 * Thanks!
 * Images look good as far as Creative Commons licensing goes (the one in the main infobox is of exceptional quality for a YouTube screenshot - I wish I could find good screengrabs like that more often). The audio clip of her voice LGTM too.
 * Sources all look WP:RS at a cursory glance.
 * Thank you for providing alt text for the images :)
 * MOS:LEADLENGTH feels a bit short given the 3000+ word count – you could likely expound a little bit more on her other ventures and her artistry within reason, I understand you've gone over most of her career highlights in the lead already
 * Thank you for providing alt text for the images :)
 * MOS:LEADLENGTH feels a bit short given the 3000+ word count – you could likely expound a little bit more on her other ventures and her artistry within reason, I understand you've gone over most of her career highlights in the lead already


 * Of course! Glad to hear from you, and I’ll keep an eye out for your updates! joeyquism (talk ) 18:56, 23 June 2024 (UTC)
 * Hiya, . I've expanded the lead a tad. Not entirely sure what to put though, 'cuz I don't know if it's due weight. Pamzeis (talk) 14:27, 16 July 2024 (UTC)
 * Hi Pamzeis! I think that this is pertinent information, and the way you've written it looks great to me. Hope you're having a great week so far! joeyquism (talk ) 18:00, 16 July 2024 (UTC)