Wikipedia:Peer review/Larrys Creek/archive1

Larrys Creek
This has made good article, with some additions since. I am interested in general suggestions for improvement and if reviewers believe this could potentially be a Featured Article (I am not sure the topic is substantial enough). Basically, I have made most of the edits to this article and I would appreciate more input and feedback on it. I am working on other Pennsylvania creek articles and this is the model for those. Thanks for any feedback, Ruhrfisch 04:53, 12 July 2006 (UTC)


 * Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, AZ t 14:10, 14 July 2006 (UTC)

Note: The automated suggestions are now pasted at the bottom of this page.


 * Thanks for the suggestions, I will note those I fix here as I do them. For now I fixed WP:MOSNUM issues (added "a non-breaking space...between a number and the unit of measurement" and "spell[ed] out source units of measurements in text"). Also linked "years with full dates" and "alphabetize[d] the categories". Ruhrfisch 02:58, 15 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Removed "vague terms of size" Ruhrfisch 16:47, 18 July 2006 (UTC)
 * Removed redundancies, added more info based on WikiProject Rivers guidelines and tried tightening the intro section. Still need to add refs to intro and make it better reflect the article as a whole. Ruhrfisch 04:15, 25 July 2006 (UTC)
 * I believe I have now addressed all the automated peer review suggestions, and would appreciate any (non-automated) feedback). Thanks Ruhrfisch 15:17, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE LOOK AT THIS ARTICLE AND REVIEW IT? I am very sorry to 'shout' but I am hoping to get someone's attention (and thanks again to AndyZ for the helpful semi-automated suggestions). Thanks, Ruhrfisch 16:08, 6 August 2006 (UTC)


 * A few things I noticed:
 * in Lycoming County, Pennsylvania in the comma missing after Pennsylvania
 * The second sentence is a a bit too long
 * The Great Shamokin Path crossed the creek near its mouth,[5] where Larry Burt, the first settler (for whom Larrys Creek is named) also lived. comma missing after settler
 * and coal and iron mines extra "and"
 * Some words like northwest don't need to be linked – see WP:CONTEXT
 * the village of Cogan House, then under the Larrys Creek Covered Bridge missing and
 * It is 90 feet (27 m) long and a Burr arch truss bridge. I think it sounds slightly better without the "and a"
 * Camp Kiwanis, and the New Tribes Institute, a camp for preparing Christian missionaries. in lists of 2 items, the comma isn't necessary (and could a little bit be provided for Camp Kiwanis also?)
 * The Great Shamokin Path crossed the creek at a ford near its mouth, however, no trails of the indigenous peoples are recorded as having followed Larrys Creek north.[5] comma before however should be semicolon, or however should be changed to but
 *  Lycoming County was formed from Northumberland County prompting further growth missing comma
 * Thanks, AZ t 20:49, 6 August 2006 (UTC)


 * Thanks so much - I believe these have all been addressed now. Ruhrfisch 05:01, 7 August 2006 (UTC)

Automated Suggestions
Taken from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Peer_review/Automated/Archive_2#Larrys_Creek (cut and paste with wikilinks put back in, but not footnotes)

Larrys Creek The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic javascript program, and may or may not be accurate for the article in question.

You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, AZ t 14:07, 14 July 2006 (UTC)
 * The lead of this article may be too long, or may contain too many paragraphs. Please follow guidelines at WP:LEAD; be aware that the lead should adequately summarize the article.
 * Per WP:MOSNUM, there should be a non-breaking space -  between a number and the unit of measurement. For example, instead of 18mm, use 18 mm, which when you are editing the page, should look like: 18 mm.[4]
 * Per WP:MOSNUM, please spell out source units of measurements in text; for example, "the Moon is 380,000 kilometres (240,000 mi) from Earth.[10]
 * Per WP:CONTEXT and WP:BTW, years with full dates should be linked; for example, link January 15, 2006, but do not link January 2006.[2]
 * Please alphabetize the categories.[11]
 * Watch for redundancies that make the article too wordy instead of being crisp and concise. (You may wish to try Tony1's redundancy exercises.)
 * Vague terms of size often are unnecessary and redundant - “some”, “a variety/number/majority of”, “several”, “a few”, “many”, “any”, and “all”. For example, “All pigs are pink, so we thought of a number of ways to turn them green.”
 * Please ensure that the article has gone through a thorough copyediting so that the it exemplifies some of Wikipedia's best work. See also User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 2a. [3]