Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl characters/archive1

List of Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl characters

 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for October 2008.
 * A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for October 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed. Recently, WikiProject Anime and manga created a topic workshop to help the promotion of potential Good and Featured Topics in the article's scope. I nominated a topic for Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl (proposal seen here), and two of the articles (both lists) are not up to FL status, but both have the potential. I request a peer review of this article to get ready for WP:FLC, and it also needs a general copyedit. Thanks. --  十  八  07:21, 2 October 2008 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: Interesting list on a series I have never read or heard of. Very briefly, here are some suggestions for improvement. If you want more comments, please ask here. Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). Yours, Ruhrfisch &gt;&lt;&gt; &deg; &deg; 00:31, 10 October 2008 (UTC)
 * I think under WP:NFCC there needs to be a more detailed caption on the first image, explaining who each of the characters is
 * Article needs more references, for example all of the name meaning explanations are uncited. My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref. See WP:CITE and WP:V
 * Refs are almost all from the books themselves - are more third-party, independent sources available? Would it make sense to have more critical comments about the characters in their sections, or if the creators have talked or written about them, include that.
 * Make sure the article is written from an out-of-universe perspective - see WP:IN-U. A model article may be useful here - there are several FAs about fictional characters, such as Jabba the Hutt, that may be useful for ideas and examples to follow. I would also look at FLs that may be models.
 * Article needs a copyedit to cleanup the language in places. For example, Hazumu Osaragi (大佛 はずむ, Osaragi Hazumu?) is a student, born male, at Kashima high school in the fictional setting of Kashima ward in Tokyo, Japan near Mt. Kashima, and is the main character in the series.[1] is a bit of a runon sentence, or some things do not seem encyclopedic in tone or seem POV, naturally in She has been practicing the flute for many years and is very good at it, so naturally she joins her school's music ensemble when she enters high school.