Wikipedia:Peer review/List of museums in Somerset/archive1

List of museums in Somerset
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I have expanded it significantly, adding pictures, coords and summaries, supported by multiple references. I would like to get this to Featured list status and would any comments which would help - particularly in relation to size & layout + the text in the lead and summary sections. There are loads of other articles for counties in England (see Category:Lists of museums in England by county - which were created in a standard format, however this is the first to try to expand on the basic list and others are starting to follow the lead. Therefore comments on this article are likely to have wide application. Thanks, &mdash; Rod talk 19:46, 11 June 2010 (UTC)

At first glance the list is beautiful, lots of great pictures and well-organized. I'll add some thoughts below.

Lead
 * I think a word is missing from this sentence:
 * "In the United Kingdom is a building which has been placed on the Statutory List of Buildings of Special Architectural or Historic Interest."
 * Perhaps "this" after "Kingdom" and before "is"? Not sure though.
 * Revised.


 * This sentence is a bit wordy:
 * "In England and Wales the authority for listing is granted by the Planning (Listed Buildings and Conservation Areas) Act 1990 and is presently administered by English Heritage, an agency of the Department for Culture, Media and Sport, and Cadw in Wales (where it is a devolved issue)."
 * I would recommend ending the sentence after "1990". I would also recommend adding an "of" between "Act" and "1990".  I would then remove "presently", which is unnecessary since the context makes it clear you are talking about the present.  I'm not sure it is necessary to say it is a devolved issue, it just seems a bit to detailed for me.  But I'll leave that to you.
 * I've shortened the sentence (& removed the reference to Wales which is not relevant), however the format of the wording of the Act is set in UK law.


 * You have Grade II* and Grade II. Is this intentional?  If so what is the "*" for?
 * Yes - they are different classifications II* is higher than II


 * I don't think you need to capitalize Local museums. Local is not a proper noun.
 * Done


 * I would move these instructions under the Museums heading rather than have it in the lead:
 * "To use the sortable table, click on the icons at the top of each column to sort that column in alphabetical order; click again for reverse alphabetical order."
 * Done

Museums
 * Some of the summaries have the grade listing and others don't. Is this because the grade listing is not always available?  If it is available each summary should be consistent with the grade listing.
 * Not all of the buildings which house the museums are listed buildings


 * Watch out for linking common English terms like garden, and ink. The list is a bit over-linked.
 * Thanks I will go through & look at these
 * Done


 * Listed building is linked several times. Per WP:LINK it is only necessary to link it once in the lead and once or perhaps twice in the body of the article.
 * I have this debate about sortable lists before - if the 1st occurrence is linked & then someone changes the list order it is no longer the first occurrence - but it is linked in the lead so I may remove them all.
 * Done


 * "Artefacts", is this the British spelling of the word? I think it's "Artifacts" in the US.  Please check.
 * Yes a UK variant - see 1st line of Artifact (archaeology)


 * In the Bath Postal Museum it says, "There was also a replica Victorian post office." The rest of the summary is present tense, should "was" be "is"?
 * I will check - but this one moved a few years ago & what is in the new premises is different to the previous one.


 * Is there a plan to add the images that are missing? That would really complete the list.
 * I can't find public domain or suitably licenced images for the others - I will keep trying

More to come. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 17:38, 16 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks - really helpful so far.&mdash; Rod talk 18:27, 16 June 2010 (UTC)


 * The summary of the Bruton Museum says it is in the Town's High Street. What town?  The town of Bruton?  As I am not familiar with Somerset county I don't know if there is a town called Bruton.  Perhaps this could be spelled out better?
 * Done


 * Linking Local museum in the Type column only needs to be done once, same for any other type of museum.
 * Done


 * National trust is linked a lot, link once in the lead and once in the body of the article. That's all that is necessary.
 * Done


 * "...and a room is dedicated to the live and work of Parson James Woodforde." Do you mean "life" rather than "live"?
 * Done


 * In the Chard Museum summary you have "VC", which should be spelled out as Victoria Cross. Abbreviations should only be used after they have been spelled out so that readers who are unfamiliar with them will understand.  Linking it is fine but it should still be spelled out for the first usage of the term.
 * Done


 * This sentence needs some connecting words:
 * "Operated by the National Trust, 14th century manor house, collections of Nailsea glass and Eltonware pottery."
 * Perhaps rewrite thus: "Operated by the National Trust, this 14th century manor house contains collections of Nailsea glass and Eltonware pottery."
 * Done


 * Similar issues with this sentence:
 * "Operated by the National Trust, home of poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge.[61] It was constructed in the 17th century."
 * I would rewrite it like this: "Operated by the National Trust, this home of poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge was constructed in the 17th century."
 * Done
 * Also you only need one in-line cite for ref 61, you don't need two.
 * Done


 * Watch out for terms like this, "...it is considered by many...." This phrase is considered weasel words. It is located in the summary of the Cothay Manor.  Think about rewording if possible.
 * In the Crewkerne and District Museum summary, "...a old house...." "A" should be "an". Also these words should not be capitalized: Coins and Medals, Costume and Textiles, Fine Art, Music, Personalities, Science and Technology, Social History, Weapons and War.  They aren't proper nouns.
 * Done


 * In the Fyne Court summary is "AONB". What does this stand for?  Again watch the use of abbreviations without first spelling it out.
 * Done


 * There are a couple of issues with the Holburne Museum of Art summary. First you duplicate wording, "silver, Old Master paintings, Italian bronzes,...maiolica (which is spelled differently in the two times it is mentioned in the summary), porcelain, glass, furniture and portrait miniatures.  Second, the terms are linked in the second mention rather than the first, this should be reversed, well actually one of these lists should be removed entirely.  Third, silver is linked to the medal, is there a display of silver nuggets, silve coins, silverware, it seems a bit general to simply say "silver".  If that is as specific as the source goes then leave it as is.
 * Done


 * In the Market House Museum summary this list should not be capitalized, "Archaeology, Coins and Medals, Land Transport, Maritime, Natural Sciences, Science and Technology and Social History."
 * Done


 * In the Museum of Bath and Work summary is this sentence,
 * "This museum was established in 1978 to present the commercial development of Bath over the last 2000 years and includes displays on four floors."
 * Do you really mean the last 2000 years? If so that's fine, it just seems like maybe it should be 200 years?  Just wondering.
 * Yep since Roman times


 * In the Museum of Somerset the term "fine silver" is used with silver linked to the article on the mineral. I think it would be better to link it to silverware or something more specific.  I assume that is what is intended when the adjective "fine" precedes "silver".
 * Done

More to come. H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 18:47, 16 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Sorry I have to edit in chunks. In the Porlock Museum summary the Herb Garden should not be capitalized.
 * Done


 * There are several instances of sentence fragments like this one, "Operated by the National Trust, 14th century house." This is found in Priest's House. It would be good to check the first sentence of each summary and make sure you have complete sentences rather than fragments.
 * In the Somerset Military Museum you have "artifacts" spelled with an "i".
 * Done


 * In Tropiquaria, "The building was an an art deco BBC" only one "an" is necessary.
 * Done


 * I have an issue with this phrase in the Tyntesfield summary, "...and is highly picturesque, bristling with turrets and possessing an elaborate roof." It starts to sound like a travel book here.  Words like "picturesque" and "elaborate" are very descriptive and probably correct, but also are opinions that we should avoid in an encyclopedia (in my humble opinion of course).
 * Done


 * Is there a missing word in this sentence from the Watchet Boat Museum summary?
 * Done
 * "There is also an example of a mudhorse which is a wooden sledge is propelled across the mudflats to collect fish from nets."
 * I'm looking at between "sledge" and "is". Perhaps "that"?
 * Done
 * Also in the same summary, "The museum specialises in the shallow draft Flatner, a form of vessel..." I would remove "form of".  This seems like unnecessary wording.  I would then add a "that was" after vessel.
 * Done


 * This is just a little pet peeve of mine found in the West Somerset Rural Life Museum and Victorian School:
 * "The building was built in 1821 as the village school and was closed in 1981."
 * "Building was built" uses duplicate root words. Try changing "built" to "constructed" or some other word that doesn't have the same root as "building".
 * Done


 * In the summary of West Somerset Railway, what is GWR? In the Yeovil Railway Centre summary G.W.R. is listed with periods and is linked.
 * Done

References
 * Travel publications are not the worst sources possible but they aren't seen a very credible. That said sometimes it's all we have.  Wherever possible though it's good to find other sources.
 * You use Images of England several times. Is this a book?  If so please include page numbers.  It's linked to an article about a database of photos.  Is that the source you are referring to?  Sorry last stop, I'll finish the review very soon.  H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 19:18, 16 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Ok, I'm back. Ref #24 has "Things to see and do".  Is this the name of a magazine?  A book?  A website?  Sorry it's a bit confusing.
 * Changed


 * Ref 86 appears to be a book but I don't see a page number.
 * Done


 * Ref 107 has a "pp." which is used for multiple pages but only one page is listed (73). I suggest removing one of the "p's".
 * Done


 * Ref 133 also has no page number though it appears to be a book. Same for refs 142, 161, and 164.
 * Done for 133 & 142 - 161 & 164 to do.&mdash; Rod talk 15:37, 19 June 2010 (UTC)


 * What makes the Website of Bob Speel credible? See ref 182.
 * There are no publishers and accessdates for refs 193 and 194.
 * Done


 * Ref 201 is a url only, no title, publisher or accessdate.
 * Done.&mdash; Rod talk 21:23, 16 June 2010 (UTC)

Overall
 * The article is very well done. Much of the suggestions above are nitpicky and specific in order to tighten up the writing and make sure everything is consistent.  I'd say you're very close to being able to list it at WP:FLC.  This concludes my review.  If you have any questions or concerns please contact me on my talk page as I do not routinely watch review pages.  Please consider reviewing an article here or at WP:GAC to help reduce the backlog.  Thanks and good luck.  H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 20:11, 16 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks for a very thorough review. I've dealt with some of the issues and hope to get to the otnhers over the next few days.&mdash; Rod talk 20:47, 16 June 2010 (UTC)