Wikipedia:Peer review/Norwegian monarchy/archive1

Norwegian monarchy
Needs a general review and tips on improvement.Inge 10:58, 31 October 2006 (UTC)
 * Convert the reference sources to inline citations. -Fsotrain09 16:01, 31 October 2006 (UTC)
 * I thought the present article had inline citations...? Inge 17:22, 31 October 2006 (UTC)
 * Well, 5 is quite few. Can more be included, and can they be more detailed? - Tutmosis  19:06, 31 October 2006 (UTC)
 * Inline citations are now up to 14 and are more detailed. Inge 15:13, 2 November 2006 (UTC)


 * Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, AZ t 22:36, 31 October 2006 (UTC)
 * I think "Constitutional rights and privileges" and "Succession" can be combined since they all deal with the constitution. Also the "Constitutional rights and privileges" doesn't need subheading when they each only have 1 or 2 actual sentences. Sections; "Finances", "Residences", "Coronation" and "Royal coat of arms" could also be combined into one section like "Life" or something of that sort. I say so because "Finances" and "Royal coat of arms" are especially thin (in terms of prose) and look unattractive. The lead is weak with 1/2 sentence paragraphs. Even though its great that you increated number of inline citations, some whole sub-sections from "History" are completely absent of them. And lastly the copyedit tag needs to be taken care of. Thanks. - Tutmosis  19:46, 3 November 2006 (UTC)


 * I've gone through and copyedited the history section (and so removed the tag, though I don't claim it is now perfect); it does need more citations - I thought I read somewhere that at a minimum each paragraph should have a source, but I can't find that on WP:CITE or similar. In any case only one or two of the sources cited relate to the history, and those don't cover the whole period. Handfesting needs to be defined somewhere, currently it's only a redlink. Also it needs to be mentioned somewhere that Sweden left the Kalmar Union (otherwise it seems a bit odd later on when Norway is ceded to Sweden). What exactly is 'the matter of separate Norwegian consuls to foreign countries'? Whose/which 'travels' were neglected after 1905?. Dr pda 00:50, 13 November 2006 (UTC)


 * I have implemented most of the advice you gave. I am a bit confused by how the lead is supposed to be. It was longer, but the automated advice from AndyZ was to shorten it... I have not combined the Sections; "Finances", "Residences", "Coronation" and "Royal coat of arms". I believe the topics fit better as separate sections. I have expanded some, but espeshially Finances needs some work and if it isn't possible to get good enough it will be merged someplace.Inge 12:04, 21 November 2006 (UTC)